Tuesday, September 8, 2009

I don't care what Harry says...

... men and women CAN be friends! Really! And the sex part doesn't have to get in the way!

In the 80s movie When Harry Met Sally, there is an infamous scene and ongoing theme in the film that men and women can't be friends without there being some sort of sexual attraction. And of course, the film goes from there in an ironic fashion. (This is one of my favorite movies of ALL time and I could type the dialogue verbatim between Harry and Sally Albright, which also ties in an analysis of Ingrid Bergman's character in Casablanca of why she married Victor Laszlo instead of bar owner Rick in the scene where it all kicks off.)

But Farrago and are are JUST FRIENDS. There is not sexual attraction. There is no sexual tension. There is no sexual undercurrent. We're not former 'flames'. Nada. Zip. Zero. Zilch. We are just friends.

And the reason I bring this up is because while I was in Chicago over the weekend, I had several conversations with people on this very subject. One was with a woman at the karaoke party named K. K is married but thinks Farrago is, in her words, "totally hot." I'm like, "really?" and turn around to look at him. I don't see it. I mean, I don't think he's repulsive or anything but he's just not my type nor am I attracted to him; if he was the last man on earth and I were the last woman, the human population probably wouldn't die out, but that might be the only situation where he and I would ever have sex. Then she goes on and give me the third degree, wanting to know if we've ever dated, fucked, kissed, or made out and she just can't believe that none of that ever happened, nor do I desire it to happen. Because she really wants to date, fuck, kiss and make out with Farrago- which is a whole other can of worms, if you will.

Another guy at the party, whom I shall call R. also ran me through the same thing of wanting to know if Farrago and I were a "couple" or a former couple or just ever... "ya know" once. And I said nope. He then wanted to know if there was an undercurrent of sexual tension between us and again, I said nope. Farrago was just a buddy, a great friend, sort of like the older brother I never had. I can pick on him and he's nice about it-- and sometimes picks back. We talk and laugh and hang out, but that's as far as it goes. We never even flirt. R. was shocked and I'm not sure he totally bought it since he said he has a platonic female friend and they've "never" but he thinks she's hot.

So, I guess we're living proof that men and women can just be friends, no more no less. And I need friends more than I ever need or will need a "boyfriend", that's for sure!

And Farrago-- no offense was meant during the writing of this post!

Platonic and liking that status,


Curley said...

It would be a sad lonely world if the only platonic friends that women had were other women. My only question is, "If they knew you were gay(which I know you're not), would they have been even asking you any of these questions?"

Maggie said...

Curley- I think if they thought either of us were gay no one would have said a word, actually!