Teenage Wasteland

Saturday Mac was going to graduation open houses and then to a bonfire. I know what that means- kegger. Before he left, I told him to not become a cliche nor a statistic and to not drink and drive. If he got drunk, I told him to either call me for a ride, sleep over at the party or sleep in his car. And before he left, my uncle also told him to not be afraid to call for a ride. (Please don't judge my parenting... it was a choice I made.)

Apparently he goes to the open houses and then to the bonfire. He gets there and pretty much everyone he knows is pretty much blatto and the big rumor is that the party is going to be busted by the cops. Mac decides, when he heard that, to stay sober. He hangs out and then the word goes out that the cops are on the way to raid the party so he gets a bunch of kids in his car and they all take off, him being the designated driver.

The girl who was hosting the drunken bonfire we'll call ADumbAssGirl because she posted on her Facebook about her kegger which is how the cops knew about it- idiot. She ended up in Mac's car, as did two of Mac's best buds, R and J. ADumbAssGirl want to go to a little town about 25 minutes from here. Mac said no but she then said she would drive herself, so he decides to drive her and incur the wrath of me later. But just as they get to the edge of town ADumbAssGirl has him pull into a parking lot and she gets out of the car and into another with a guy, leaving Mac and his friends to follow them, to go to another party. Mac is sober and while R and J were fairly drunk they all decide they don't want to go to the party because they guy ADumbAssGirl got in the car with is a known around town drug dealer- they should it was a bad idea.

So J suggests they go hang out at his patents lake cabin. It hadn't been opened up yet and the floor was covered with rat poop but they decided "what the heck- why not?". As Mac pulls into the cabin driveway, another car comes in behind them and 3 more guy friends spill out. As Mac steps on the break to stop the car, he hears a weird sound from the rear. He thought the guys behind him hit him. They all look at the rear of the car and determine no danger so Mac opens the trunk. And do you know what was there?

Two bottles of 7-Up, a gallon of generic Hawaiian Punch, and two Dirty Thirties. For those of you who don't speak 17-year old boy, that means there were two 30 packs of beer. In Mac's trunk. No one knows where it came from. All they can think is that ADumbAssGirl was supposed to bring it to the next party and when the guys didn't go...

to them, it was manna from the gods.

So what are six 17 and 18 year old boys to do on a Saturday night on the first weekend of summer vacation at a deserted lake cabin when faced with 60 cans of beer? Oh yeah.

So they drank beer and hung out at the lake, sat around being stupid guys and trading stories and just... being.

Mac slept in his car because even he was to weak to withstand the siren call of 60 cans of free beer for the taking.

At this point in my narrative, I would like to point out that I get this entire story from Mac when he got home Sunday morning. Without a shirt. Missing one shoe. When he left the house Saturday night, I distinctly remember he had on a shirt, and 2 shoes.

So Sunday morning he fills me in and all he really remembers is that it was hot outside so they were all sitting around without shirts. (Keep the homo-erotic comments to your collective selves, please). They didn't want to go in because of the rat poop and it was too hot to sleep in the car so he took of his shirt. He can't exactly explain the shoe. I don't think I want to know. It was just a flip-flop.

Two funny things:
1) One kid convinced the others to smoke a joint. They passed it around and Mac said he never smoked pot before but thought- what the hell. (Again, we aren't going there as parents right now) He thought it smelled really flowery and tasted terrible and burned and was awful. Until the kids who got the other 5 to smoke let them in on the joke: they smoked room freshener incense. Dumbasses.

2) Mac came straight in the house and went straight to the bathroom and showered. Because he drank about 14 beers and then passed out and then subsequently peed on himself in his sleep... yeah. I also made him clean the car seat.

At least he didn't drink and drive. And he didn't let his friends drive drunk.

He would probably kill me if he knew I told this story to the blogging world, but I just can't help it. There is so much stupidity crammed into one evening. And when you see those teen comedy drinking movies you can stop wondering what inspires them...

Mac's mom,
Maggie

Well, it FEELS like "Little House on the Prairie"

Since I'm teaching a history of rock and roll music this summer, one of the things I've done in my preparation is to create several brief but interactive Power Points to use on a Smartboard. For those of you who don't know what a Smartboard is: it looks like a white board but it's actually a large computer-ish screen and you can touch the board, making it interactive. For example, you show your Power Point slides on it, and then use the special Smartboard markers to write on the shown image and then move to the next slide, the writing slides away. Oh, hell, just google Smartboard since I'm doing a crappy explanation.

The point is, I made a Power Point slide show (several of them) with interactive games, Behind the Music video clips from YouTube (because those are free and buying the sets from VH1 are prohibitively expensive), and lots of pictures and set to music. I made 4 of these. Sounds cool, if I do say so myself. Right?

Except.... But... (there's always a "but")

Except... the school where I'm teaching doesn't give the part-time summer staff computer access. No passwords, no logins. Well, okay, that doesn't sound so bad, I think. I have a laptop and the building is wireless so I can bring all my presentations that way, and just hook into one of their LCD projects and show it from my laptop to the Smartboard.

Except...

Except the guy in charge isn't sure he will be able to give me the wireless password.

Except they don't have any Smartboards.

Except they don't have any LCD projects.

So... for those of you keeping score here, I have an interactive Power Point with games, video, pictures, and music and no way to show it, to anyone. No way to get the videos from the net, no speakers so people could hear the music, no-- well, hell, no projector to show it at all!

Like I said, it's like Little House on the Prairie teaching! Well, other than the fact that we will have central air conditioning, and electricity, and I won't be arriving by horse and buggy... but Miss Beatle and I are both single... but I digress.

Oh oh OH!!! AND!!! The kids have zero access to computers for the summer. None, zip, zilch. So no activities that would involve them looking stuff up on the Internet. And the library is closed this summer (for repainting and asbestos removal) so we can't even use... BOOKS!

Guess what I spent most of yesterday doing? Revamping ALL my lesson plans for the music class. I did three days worth. Now, those of you who are old school and have taught the days before video and the Internet and technology, enjoy the laugh. But think about it: how many of us design our lessons using technology? Using the net? Who rely on these to provide quality "edutainment" in this era of kids with an MTv attention span?

I am going to ask if I can have an overhead projector because if I can, then I'll copy all my Power Point slides onto overhead so they could at least see the pictures and the text. I have all the music on my iPod, and will bring it with me, and my iHome and play music that way. I've converted the games to construction paper and markers and bells. I'm screwed with the video clips. They are copy-righted so I can't even illegally down them and burn them on DVD. It's just weird to think backwards, I guess.

Back to the drawing board, since there isn't a Smartboard,
Maggie

A celebration of all things Pink!

Today is the 2nd birthday of "Pink Saturdays" created by Beverly at How Sweet the Sound. Please enjoy the pinks I have for you today and feel free to pop over and see all the other pink blogs; Beverly is having a giveaway in honor of the birthday, along with balloons and cake, of course! Never knew there was so much pink in the world....

I love shoes... have I mentioned that?

Words to live by...

Let them eat cake... as long as it's pink, of course! And I think cupcakes are the world's most perfect desserts!

Happy Birthday to Pink Saturday!
Maggie Mae

Brain freeze

I had about 389 ideas for posts for today, as I was writing this last night, but for the life of me, I can't think of one of them. I'm so tired, I guess. I had a few funny stories about... stuff, I think.

On Thursday evening:

The whole fam-damily arrived from Texas. We went to meet the Nephew. I had a minor computer issue that figured itself out. I worried about the birth of the baby. This was a day of special education students taking final exams (using the DUMBEST exam schedules in the history of schedules). I had to clean the kitchen, do a load of laundry, and make up the bed for the guests. I've worried because of a friend of mine is angry with me (he's giving me the silent treatment... nice) and is now ignoring me. Mac made plans and left the house, then changed his plans and left again. We went out to dinner. I returned library books. I have a new job lead that's going to require some fast re-doing of the resume.

Lemme think; I'm sure I can do better than this later today. And if not... well, there's always tomorrow!

Mags

Baby Watch- Introducing...

My nephew!

Welcome!
8 lbs, 3 ozs, 20 inches long!
Pictured here, he's 7 hours old.
What a little champ!
I'm gonna have to come up with a cute little name for this cute little guy!

Love,
Auntie Maggie

Baby Watch Day 3- He's HERE!

At 10:09 am today, (EST USA) my nephew arrived, weighing in at 8 lbs and 3 oz! At this time, other than his weight and knowing that he's a boy, I know nothing. As soon as school is dismissed I'm heading to the hospital to see him. More information and pictures will be forthcoming!

His mommy and he are doing fine!

Thanks for all your prayers, well wishes and good thoughts!

Auntie Mags

Baby Watch Day 3 at 6:30 AM EST USA

Still no baby......................................

Baby Watch Day 2 but later in the day

I think I should've started counting with: "Baby Watch Hour ____" rather than days...

The baby is en route. Sisinlaw is hooked up to the Pitocin IV and had an epidural. Her dilator is dilated and the baby has "assumed the position." Her doctor said he should be here before midnight.

Keep your fingers crossed!

Maggie

Baby Watch Day 2

Still no baby. Sisinlaw still dilated but to 4 now, and is having regular contractions.

If he doesn't appear on his own before 5:45am tomorrow morning, she'll be induced.

Stubborn booger. I like him already!

Auntie in wait of a nephew,
Mags

Exhaustion is an excuse for a meme on Hump Day

I have about 80 things- pithy and witty things about being tired and humping but we all know it would be lies- I could say but I'm too tired so I'm cheating and leaving you with a meme this morning. I might come back tonight and post something but prolly not since the fam-damily from Texas is heading north in the next 36 hours. This means major cleaning of the attic bedroom because it's turning into the Walton's up there- Mac, me, and Aunt and Uncle Lone Stars will be in residence for about five days.

And to maintain honour among thieves, thanks to Sunday Stealing for my meme!

1) What's your middle name?
Mae

2) How old are you?
38

3) Where are you from? Are you living there right now?
Civilization, and yes I am, for now

4) Is it cold where you are?
no; it's rather muggy but thanks for asking

5) What's the time?
early freaking morning

6) What are you wearing?
army green capris, purple silk& cotton t-shirt, bare feet, matching red bra and underwear

7) What was the last thing you listened to?
Lady Gaga and KISS covers on Glee (Mac is a Gleek)

8) What was the last thing you ate?
Double stuff Oreos

9) What was the last thing you watched on TV?
Glee

10) What's your favorite tv show? Why?
Big Bang Theory because the humor is "smart"; House because the writing is creative and on the edge (oh and hell, because Hugh Laurie's real life accent is smokin' hawt!)

11) Quick! Find a book, or something with text on it! Flip to a random page and post the second paragraph's first sentence.
"I don't want to talk about it."

12) What was the last movie you saw? How was it?
Why Did I get married (the first one) and it wasn't bad

13) Do YOU think you have an accent? Where do people in your country do people speak with strong accents?
I didn't think I did until I moved to the Wild West and everyone there said I had a huge accent so I guess I do. Areas of the US with accents that are thick and noticeable: the deep South, Boston, the Bronx, and northern Minnesota, to name a few.

Baby Watch Day 1- Taking his own sweet time!

My Sisinlaw is pregnant for the second baby. As I've mentioned, he's a boy. This has been a rougher pregnancy for her than The Divine Ms. K was. (Now that lil girl is practically perfect in every way!!)

His due date is June 3 (or the 6th or the 8th- the three of us in the room right now, none of us being the parents, by the way, all say different ones). But Sisinlaw is dilated and been having contractions forever. We all really thought he might make an appearance over the weekend, but nope, still no baby. This lad has a mind of his own, for sure, the little booger. He's ornery already!

I hope post about him will be like a nudge or something- me complaining about him not wanting to show is cute little face, and then to spite me, he'll pop on out!

And for the sake of my Sisinlaw's body and mind (she is so positive; I would've killed someone by now if I were her uterus) I hope he gets here soon!!!!

Oh, and in case ya wanna know, here's a picture of a 3-D ultra sound that was taken 2 weeks ago! Look at those cheeks; I just wanna kiss 'em!

Waitin' to be an Auntie again,
Mags

Things that make you go "WTF?"

#1: I get a newsletter from my college Alma Mater. According to said newsletter, the college has a whole bunch of committees that do stuff. We have TONS of committees! Now there's one more. The administration felt it prudent to form a committee to study the number of committees and their purposes.

#2: Teachers have individual voice mails at the school. The secretaries don't take messages any more. If someone would call for a teacher and say, "Go get Mr. Soandso, it's an emergency. His house is on fire" or something like that, they would go get the teacher. OTHERWISE, everything goes to voice mail. There are no paper messages. Though Friday, Daddy-O got a paper message from the office to go check his voice mail because my brother called and left him a voice mail. Uh.... yeah.

#3: I'm really tired of kids and teaching and classrooms, but what is my summer job? Teaching summer school....

Ah the ironies of life,
Mags

Comfort

The other night I was at a friend's house. She's a fellow teacher and is one of my all time favorite people on the planet. I went over to help her grade papers because she was behind because earlier this year she found out she's... sick. So I went to help her mark papers.

I love her house. There is something about her and her homes that are wonderful. I say homes because I've been in four of her homes (that's how many times she's moved) in the 15 years she and I have been friends, and they are always warm and welcoming places. Comfortable. Cluttered. Pretty. They smell good. I can laugh or cry at her house and have done both. I can sit with her alone o in a crowd of her family and friends or with a passel of her students and it all feels good- and I have done all this. I've sat with just her, in silence or watching tv or listening to music or working. No matter what, her house is just a haven of comfort. There are times when I feel distressed in life and I want to go to her house and just smell it, and sit on the denim couch, pet her dog and just "be." She is a good person and would let me, too.

I learned to bake bread there. She gives me books. She burns candles and has scented lotions. Her dog is kind, and her husband is a dry wit who understand her quirks and those of her friends. She always has fresh brewed ice tea. She has colorful post-it notes and colored ink pens. She has blankets and quilts scattered around, the carpet is squashy in your bare toes, the hardwood isn't sticky, and her bathroom always has three-ply Charmine and Bath & Body Works soap pumps. She's a photographer and she decorates the walls with her prints; not a way that's "prima donna" but because her work is beautiful and simple and pleasing. She has piles of books and magazines, camera parts, and a cat who steals things out of your purse; her name is Kitty, the cat not my friend. I love that her couch is a sectional, wrap around denim thing that you sink into and it's comfortable and perfect and safe. She still has her Willow Tree Nativity set up in May. I love her space. I want to spend a week at her house and call it "vacation." And I can only love her space because of her, and I love her. She is me, but the good version of me, who I used to be. It's also what I think of as 'home,' or a version of it. Maybe it's what I want my home to be, when I have one, what I try and create in my own space. She never changes and neither does her presence, no matter what shape her dwelling takes.

The other night when we were grading, at her instance we had to go to the supermarket to get "grading food." I understand this. We had to have the right snacks at our elbows. We got Double Stuffed Oreos, Pizza Flavored Goldfish Crackers, and Hershey Nuggets, milk chocolate flavored. I had Pepsi, with caffeine, and there was the always present ice tea for a back up. Yes, we are grown adult women and this is the food we choose because, we are grading and you must have grading food; we are quirky.

And I consumed all that junk. I never batted an eye over doing that, either. It what's done. That's how it works. It was the plan. I would never, at home, in a million years, eat an entire container of Oreos, a bag of fish crackers and a bag of chocolate, over the course of 7 hours. But the other night was a grading marathon and we did eat all the crap- together- so I guess I only ate half. And I don't feel guilty, not even now. Because it's what she said we do and she is right in all things, kind, good, and so that's what we did.

I giggled before I wrote this post because I was just sitting on Daddy-O's couch, reading and thinking I wanted something to drink and I didn't want to have anymore caffeine soda since it was so late. Then I had to giggle because that never crossed my mind the other night, and it was a school night, too! I smiled in spite of myself, over all the food I ate, because it was the right place, the right event, the right time, the right person, the right firend, and it was just.... it just was.

And until then I didn't even know Goldfish came in pizza flavor...

Mags

Not a happy camper

I hate being patronized, I hate being manipulated, and I hate being used. It makes me angry.

I also hate it when people withhold information, letting me (or others, and you will soon see what I mean) just twist in the wind, wondering what is going on. I hate it in relationships, at work, with friends, anywhere. If I'm in romantic relationship and a Sam has something to say, he just needs to say it, quick, get it over with, like ripping off a Band-Aid. No silent treatment, no beating around the bush. I just hate it. I hate it at work as well. And, yes I do have a very current and REAL life example.

As you all know, I am currently an aide in a special ed. department at a junior high school. I'm finishing a contract and I was told when I was hired that it was for this year, and this year only. When school was done in June, I was done as well. Okay-- cool, sorta. I knew where I stood. I knew it and I was fine. I had a beginning, a middle and an end. I could plan accordingly. Got it. And while I didn't necessarily like it, I still had KNOWLEDGE; and knowledge is power.

I also know what sort of crisis education is facing in states all over the country. They don't have money, budgets are slashed, teachers are being riffed, programs are cut. I understand, maybe much better than many other teachers. I am not a stupid woman, and treating me as such pisses me off.

I've worked this job and haven't suffered from "short timers" syndrome. I treated this job like I did when I was an actual full-time, classroom teacher. I stayed after school, I volunteered for stuff, I helped. I did what I was asked and then some. Not a problem for me; it's just my personality. I've received some very nice compliments from kids, parents, and fellow teachers. That's always a plus. And it's nice to hear; we all like to be given 'atta boys'.

Now, about 3 weeks ago the 8th graders in our building were given their Frosh schedules for the fall. My name is on the freshmen schedules for a few classes. WTF? First, this is an entirely different building than the one I'm in now. Secondly, there is no way someone could have "accidentally" clicked on my name in a computer; I would've had to be be manually entered into the system. Third, this is for an entirely different school system. No, this couldn't be an ACCIDENT, is my point here.

No one has told me I have a job next year. No one has asked me if I want a job next year. No one has claimed responsibility for my name on schedules. No one has mentioned it to me EXCEPT my students. Who are psyched that they get me next year. That are thrilled I get to advance with them to make high school less scary. To have a familiar face helping them next year.

I'm half sick over it. I don't know what to say to the kids. I've resorted to telling them it was a typo but if it changes, I'd let them know. This is NOT fair to those kids. I have a special relationship with many of these at-risk kids. They are counting on me. And if I'm NOT there next year, they'll be given some stupid song and dance about why, rather than the truth, and I'll just be thought of as another adult who let them down. This fuels my ire.

I know I could go to the administration and ask what's going one. But, frankly, it's not my responsibility. I went to this administration about 5 weeks ago and begged-- yes, I begged-- for a job because three English teachers were leaving. Guess what happened? I was given a non-committal, political song and dance routine that was a non-answer answer. Meaning, I got nothing. Then other people were hired instead of me. I would think someone could bother to come to me to tell me I have a job as an aide since they stuck my name on a schedule. The 'administration' knows I'm interested in a job.

Furthermore, I am, technically, the uber last person on the seniority totem pole when it comes to all the aides who work for the system. I am smack so far at the bottom, I can see the Devil's ass from where I sit. There are about 10 other people with more seniority between the high school and junior high buildings alone; that doesn't even take into consideration ALL the aides, district wide. So MY name appears on about 50 student schedules so other aides, who haven't been told in in the wonderful world of budget cuts if THEY have jobs next year (that's right; none of the aides know if they have jobs next year), are pissed. At me. I keep saying no one has talked to me and it has to be a typo, but they're mad. At me. And it makes things rather... shall we say, uncomfortable, for me? It's not what you'd call a pleasant working environment as far as my peers go. AWK-ward!

I just feel like I'm being... manipulated. And I don't like it. I need a job and this isn't nice to do to someone in my situation.

Don't fuck with me,
Mags

A rainy day moment in the life of a Special Education Teacher

It's pouring down rain right this minute, and the skies broke loose with a terrible lightening and thunderstorms flood out of the sky, about 5 minutes before school let out today.

Kids were running pell-mell across the parking lots to their parents waiting cars, to the buses, and toward friends if they were walking in the deluge. Teachers and administrators on outside safety duty are yelling at the kids to "Be Careful!", to "Watch for cars", and to "Look both ways!"

I'm walking out of the building with a counselor from our local in-patient treatment center (ie: local nut house) who had to come and collect one of the middle schoolers who had a TOTAL meltdown last period of the day. Counselor and I are walking out together and Melt Down Boy is with us, dancing around in the rain.

While all the other teachers are yelling practical rainy-day type of things, when Melt Down Boy runs toward the counselor's car, he and I yell things like, "Don't listen to the voices; just get in the car!"

TGIF,
Maggie Mae

An axe to grind?

I want to learn to play the guitar. I do. Does it sound really silly? I mean, I don't want to learn so I can play in a band and go on tour or anything. I just want to learn to play so I can just... play. To entertain myself more than anymore else.

My problem is that I have part of my personality that just can't seem to "learn" something like a normal person. I feel like I need lessons and instructions. When I don't know how to do something, I want to "learn" it right and then not make mistakes. I know there are people everywhere, who pick up a guitar and play around with it and can then suddenly be self taught and can pluck out stuff that most can recognize. When I've tried to do that, I just make noise that doesn't sound like any sort of music at all.

I love the video of "Weary Kind" I linked here. Not only do I like the song and the lyrics and think Bingham is cute, I like that it's all guitar and I want to learn how to play that song. Yes, I realize he's(probably, I don't know for sure, just guessing) been playing since he could walk and I don't expect to get that good, but just enough that I could play it and know it was "Weary Kind". And that's just one example; there are a ton of songs that I've wanted to learn to play on the guitar.

I don't know if I should just take some lessons, or get myself a used guitar and a book and try to figure out the basics or what...

This might he a totally stupid idea. I can't even play "Guitar Hero!" maybe it's one of those things I should just leave as a dream.

Certainly not the next Slowhand,
Maggie

On another note...

I know what I'm doing this summer

I have a summer job! A teaching job! And I know that seems ironic or even funny from a woman who is counting down the days of the regular school year, BUT... there is always a BUT, but this is really different.

I'll be teaching at a prison school. well, that's a little harsh. There is a residential facility for kids who are court ordered there, as a foster placement, or as a day school for some kids who can't function in a public school. It's a type of "jail" without bars for juvenile offenders.

Because it's a residential facility the kids are required to take classes all summer long- no unaccounted for or unstructured time so they offer academic classes for kids who need them (like if they failed history, for example, then they have to re-take the history. Same with English, science, etc...) and then for all the other kids, they have fun programs. I get to teach the FUN stuff because they let their regular faculty teach the academics.

I get to design my very own classes! I can teach anything I want! I get a supplies reimbursement for $7 per child. I can teach 2 classes each day.

I'll only have 10-14 kids per class. The classes are gender segregated, either all boys or all girls. They wear uniforms. There are not grades; the kids just earn points toward special privileges.

There are 4 summer sessions (called modules). During each module I'm going to teach 2 different classes, a morning one and an afternoon one. The morning class is from 9-11am. The afternoon class is from 1230-230pm. That's merely 4 hours a day. Each module runs for 10 days. I can teach just 1 or 2 or 3 or all 4. I also get paid $56 (hello, $14 per hour!) per day and the school provides me a free lunch! I'll have my own classroom each 10 days, the same one in the morning and afternoon so I can decorate bulletin boards and the like if I want! Also, because these are supposed to be fun, there is no homework to assign; homework is DISCOURAGED.

I'm kicking around the following ideas for my classes:

1) School of Rock (class title)
I would pick one genre of music a day to focus on. At the beginning of each day I would play a sample of the music and let the kids journal for about 10 minutes. Then I would do a very brief 20 minute lecture on the genre. Then the last 90 minutes I would have a variety of activities, group and individual, that revolves around the music of the day. I could not only play the music but videos as well. On days 8 and 9 would be the topic 'music in film' and the last day would be a presentation by each student with music of their choice. I also thought I could give them a list of what the genre was and encourage them to bring in a sample and play those as well.

2) Read it, See it!
Example: Monday: read a piece of literature and do activities with it, then on Tuesday, watch the companion film in its entirety (like Of Mice and Men or To Kill a Mockingbird). Do this with 5 books

3) Film 101
Teach basic skills on how to "watch" a movie like history of film, canted camera angles, use of light and shadows and music in film, etc. then show examples of each, and do activities.

I have a bunch of other ideas, too. I was thinking of a creative writing class but someone else is already doing that. But it all sounds like such fun!!! I think I want to do School of Rock and Film 101.

It is just nice to think of being back in the classroom where I get to be in charge! Again, not a bad gig for summer work at all!!

Finally, good news!
Maggie Mae, teacher

Under the Covers meme

I stole this meme from The Queen's Meme...

1. Name 2 things you have done under the covers in the last week.
Sleep and roll my eyes that I have to get out of bed

2. Do you know what a woobie is? Do you have a special one?
Some kid named Kevin in the movie Mr. Mom had one, right? Like a blankie? And no, I don't have one. At my age, that might seem a bit strange.

3. What prompts you to pull the covers over your head and hide from the world?
knowing I have to go to school, but there are only 9 more days (not counting today) of that nonsense left

4. Firm or soft?
ummmm, what are we talking about here?

5. Silk or flannel?
Silk jammies

6. Lights on or off?
well, I sleep much better when the lights are off

7. Fan or no air?
oh, fan and air are great

8. Completely dark or nite light?
completely dark for sleeping, please!

9. Windows open or shut
open windows are fine with me

10. Sweet dreams or nightmares?
I suffer from both-- sometimes at the same time

11. PJ's or……
or what?

12. Set bedtime?
on a school night I'm usually more pleasant with my students if I have a good night's sleep so I try to be in the rack by 10:30pm

13. What do sheep count when they can't sleep?
they count people, of course

14. What does your alarm clock sound like?
right now it's Jason Mraz singing "I'm Yours"

15. White noise or music
neither; silence is golden

16. TV or IPod?
I used to be a firm believer that TV's should not be in bedrooms because beds were for sleeping or screwing, not watching TV. Though I do have an iPod...

17. Can you recall a pleasant dream you'd like to share?
not that I can share. It's naughty...

18. Under the covers or outside the covers
both, depending on the temperature of the room

19. Insomniac or sleep angel?
I'm well known for my insomnia

20. What is your favorite sleep aid for those tossin' and turnin' nights?
vodka. Valium. Equate sleep aid: 2 pills. Um, and before ya'll go planning an intervention, I don't usually take these three in combination.

21. Morning person or night person
Night owl

22. Bedtime snack?
okay. What are we having?

23. Hot or cold room
Cold please!

24. Bedtime ritual?
go pee, brush teeth, put on jammies, take/ drink a sleep aid, rub lotion on legs and feet, turn on alarm, fluff pillows, and read for as long as possible

25. Twin, Queen, King, Bunk or Futon
have a queen, would love a King

26. Socks or naked feet
except for the dead of winter, naked

27. Bedroom door locked or unlocked?
my bedroom is a loft attic with no door on it. If I had a door, it would be unlocked unless I was in there with... someone else.

28. Tent or hotel room
Hotel room. I do not camp, under any circumstances

29. If you could be bored to sleep, what would bore you?
lectures by the social studies teacher... I can barely stay awake during his class as it is

30. Prayers or mantra?
no and no

31. What was the worst nightmare you ever had?
it involved rings of fire, fast moving cars, the jungle, a bottomlessly deep lake and huge man-eating alligators

32. Please share any ideas on how to stop a person from snoring.
have enough sex with the snorer that you exhaust yourself and you fall asleep before they do so you don't hear 'em

33. If one purely pleasant thought could ensure fast and sound deep sleep for you every night, what would your one thought be?
I have no idea. I'm open to suggestions. It would be nice to just turn off my mind for a little bit. My brain is really full right now.

34. How many hours do you normally sleep?
not enough lately

35. Thunderstorms or quiet starry night?
both have their merits.

36. Warm bath or hot shower?
hot shower

37. What is the craziest thing that ever happened in your bed?
Daddy-O reads this so I can't tell you here. Email me if you want to know that badly!

38. Name a song you could fall asleep to.
Pachabel's "Canon in D"

39. Who last told you a bedtime story?
A former Sam of many many years ago that I used to refer to as Ian

It was windy in the Windy City, and other stuff

Saturday in Chicago was a good time. The boys LOVED the concert and thought it was the best show ever and XRay Girl and I laughed and talked and hung out which always equates to lots of fun.

Since the boys were going to the concert festival and XRay Girl and I were not, we had to have a game plan about dropping the boys off, getting them again and parking in the midterm. According to the concert web site, if we produced a ticket stub, the parking was free. But the web site neglected to tell WHERE the free parking was located, which of course we didn't find out until we arrived. We wait in a looooooooooong line of traffic to turn into the 'event parking' and the guy says to me "$20". I said, "I thought it was free?" And he said, "Oh, the free parking is at Solider Field. Now move on or $20." (He is so not getting my vote for Helpful Parking Lot Attendant of the Year Award!) So I pull ahead to another guy and he gives the worst directions in the history of the world on how to back track to Soldier Field. So we let the boys out with a promise to call them when we knew where the car was and we told them we would meet them where we left them, at the concert's conclusion. Out they went and off we went to find the elusive parking at Soldier Field.

Now Soldier Field is a large place and we could obviously see it and we could figure out which was the parking garage. But with event parking and event road closings, getting there was almost impossible, and we were only armed with directions like, "turn around and go back and when you get to the roundabout turn left and then to to the first non one way thru street and turn at the stop sign and it should be a little bit down on the left." Wha???? And we forgot one little thing: the only way to get free parking was to produce a ticket and our "tickets" had just gotten dropped off VIP style at the concert. Well shit! So, I said to hell with it, got back in line to go back, and pay the $20 for the parking at the arena.

After finally getting parked, we were at the museum complex, meaning we were smack in between the Museum of Science and Industry, the Field Museum, the Planetarium and the Shed Aquarium. XRay Girl and I were going to go the Aquarium. There were about 173 people in line in front of us but we didn't care. What we did care about was the admission price of $29.95+ tax EACH. For that price we could have lobster for dinner rather than look at 'em through a tank so we decided to ditch the fish and walk the lake shore walk to Navy Pier. It didn't look very far from where we were...

Now here I want to say that at times I am the quintessential mother. It comes more from being organized and list making than being a good mom, I think. Before we left home I made sure everyone had gone to the bathroom and we had cell phones charged and the tickets and directions. I packed a box of snacks and a cooler of bottled water and juices. I had a loaf of bread and a package of ham so they could make sandwiches on the way. I also packed a separate cooler of Power Ade for the boys so they could hydrate after the concert. I made sure they had an extra change of clothes in case it rains and a few garbage bags to sit on if they got wet, even though the forecast was, and I quote three different web sites: "a high of 71 and partly cloudy." I made sure everyone had a jacket, and cash. So you could say I was organized.

What I did forget was my own jacket. But it was supposed to be, and I quote three different web sites: "a high of 71 and partly cloudy." And I wore jeans and a t-shirt. And it was cold. Damn cold. It was never partly sunny the entire day. Not a single shine of sun did we see. And as for the 71--- 51 was more like it!

So we walked from the aquarium to Navy Pier along the lake shore route- about 3 miles- and I froze the whole way, and it was my own stupid fault. Then we got to Navy Pier and walked all over it. Finally I couldn't stand it anymore, and I bought a stupid sweatshirt. Thank god it was on sale. It's bubblegum pink and says "Chicago Navy Pier" on the front. XRay Girl, who wore a very light weight jacket, was also freezing, bought one as well, in kiwi green. Oh, yes, weren't we cute in our matching sweatshirts that just screamed "tourists"?

After strolling around Navy Pier, we hadn't done enough walking so we walked the 6 city blocks up Grand Ave to Michigan Ave, aka the Magnificent Mile. We went in a bunch of the shops- including Tiffany's- I LOVE that store! Something about all that jewelry is magical and sparkly! We also went to a shop in Macy's called Lush which sells all natural body products like shampoo, lotions, and the like. The sale associate Kate did all these awesome demonstrations on us of these cool products.

Farrago met us here and declared he was starving so we went for pizza at a place called Pizza Duo which is one of the most famous places in the city to get the infamous Chicago Deep Dish. While we were having dinner, Mac called and said they were ready to go. He said the last band sucked so he and his buddy were sitting in the car and would wait for us. We were just finishing dinner so we paid, and Farrago helped us find the right bus and off we went to collect the kids.

We rode the bus and we knew we were the last stop but the bus just kept going and going and going. I thought when it was the last stop, he would just stop at the last bus stop place thingy. So we were about 1 block from the parking lot and I asked our bus driver if we could just get out where we were because he passed about 47 bus shelters and I was afraid he would turn left when we wanted him to turn right. He asked me where we were going and I told him to the parking lot, one block ahead. Our super nice bus driver dropped us at the parking lot where we left the car!!! He just went 1 block extra since no one else was on the bus but us!***** Is that cool or what?

And we only got lost once, on the way there. XRay Girl is not allowed to read the directions anymore- she skipped an entire line sending the boys into convulsions and me into serious eye rolling mode since I was driving on the Dan Ryan Expressway. But what was cool about getting lost is that we had to go through Chinatown- twice because I was in the wrong lane- and XRay Girl, Mac nor his Buddy had ever seen it before. The boys thought it was the coolest thing ever. Mac said, "OMG, I just saw Jackie Chan" and would point to a guy. Then about 20 feet later he would say, "OMG, I just saw Jackie Chan again" and point to a different guy. He did this for about 3 blocks until we all screamed at him to shut up! But really, it was a riot. They also saw an older Chinese woman and all the jokes about her special powers and herbs and wisdom... oh just imagine two 17 year old boys ...

But it was a very cool day. I'm glad I was able to take Mac and let him have this experience. I like being able to do things like that when I can. Even when, at first, I really didn't want to! Sometimes being a mom is cool!

***** This is the second time in my life that a public bus driver went out of his/her way to drop me off where I needed to be. In summer 1990 I 'lived' in NYC for what was supposed to be a summer but... anyway. My friend and I were going to take a Circle Line Cruise around the city and we were running late and freaking out. The stop for the cruise was near the last one on the route and the bus driver heard us talking about whether we could run for it and still make it on time. She gunned the bus the three extra blocks and dropped us smack dab in front of the Circle Line Cruise Office. We had 4 minutes to spare.

Maggie

On another note...

Things you never think you'd hear together...

I have a guided study hall that I oversee one period a day. I have 4 kids assigned to me daily, and then teachers can send kids from their classrooms, in who are in need of help.

The setting: 2 kids have on head phones and are playing a computer game. They are insignificant to this story. Then I have one girl working on homework at a table. I have one boy- the smelly boy- sitting at another table, also doing homework. I'm sitting at my desk.

Girl says to me: [randomly] my new nephew is so cute.
me: Ah, that's nice. How old?
Girl: 6 weeks.
me: I bet his parents think he's a doll.
Girl: Well, my sister's (mother of the baby) boyfriend broke up with her while she was in labor.
Me [surprised]: Wow. Really? That's rough. What a jerk!
Girl: Yeah, but now he's trying to make up with her and get her to forgive him and he even asked her to the Prom.
Me [double take]: Uh, the Prom?
Girl: Yeah. My sister doesn't know what to do.
Me: Uhhhhhhhh...
Girl: He's attached to the baby, so she might go with him. And she found a pretty dress in 17! (it's a teen magazine)
Me: Well, I'm sure he wants to be near his little boy.
Girl: Oh, it's not his kid!
Me: Uhhhhhhhhhhh, then who's the dad?
Smelly Boy from across the room: my brother...

insert: "bum bum bum" here.......

I can't decide what bothers me more: who the father is, who the father isn't, she got dumped during child birth, or that going to Prom is a way to make up from being dumped during childbirth........................

Ah, kids today,
Maggie

Final days of Spring Pinkdom... and some non-pink music

I had a different plan for my Pinks today but it just didn't fall together for me, and now I'm spending all day today in Chicago so I still couldn't make it happen. So I went with plan B.

I loved spring this year and it feels like it vanished so quickly so here are some last minute blooms! Enjoy! And thanks, as always, to Beverly at How Sweet the Sound for hosting Pink Saturday.

Maggie Mae

On another note...

I love this song. I love this video. I love that Ryan Bingham is sexy.

That stupid fortune cookie! And about my laptop...

And there's another one popping up with that whole "Old friends reappearing" crap............

Haven't heard from this Sam since the beginning of October and out of the blue, he's going on a trip and is staying about 50 miles from me; he wanted to see if I wanted to have dinner.

At first I thought it would be no big deal and made dinner plans. Then I spoke with my Bro and we made arrangements for the entire fam-damily to gather around Daddy-O for his birthday for dinner. So I had to cancel dinner with that Sam, which really didn't bother me at all, frankly.

I knew XRay Girl and I should've just eaten the Mexican food along with the drinks last week...

Blame the fortune cookie mojo, cuz I ain't got game right now...
Mags

And so far so good- Curley's wonderful son got my computer working. Tall Guy is my HERO!! Huge pink lipsticky kisses and hugs, Tall Guy!!!!!!!! Thank you! I seem to be TroHo free!

Birthday Wishes

I want to take today to say a very special happy birthday to Daddy-O... aka, my father! I was gonna get all schmaltzy and weepy but...

You are wonderful and I think I'm the luckiest daughter in the world to have a dad like you; the best dad in the world, I want to point out! I know I don't tell you often enough how much I love and appreciate you, but I DO love and appreciate you!

Thanks for all you do. I love you, dad!
Have a wonderful birthday, filled with joy!

If I could just say no... I wouldn't get myself into these things

In March Mac told me about some band I never heard of coming to some venue I never heard of on a day I didn't really pay attention to in Chicago-- who says I don't listen?

Then last weekend he mentioned it again. he said I gave a distracted "uh-mmmmmmm" and went back to my computer.

Well, I guess he was really serious about going and I guess I said something about being willing to think about it and it was time to think about it.

So Mac took matters into his own hands. First, he hates his father the Fucktard Asshat Spermdonor for LOTS of reasons right now but he put that hatred aside and asked his goodfornothing SD for money for the concert. His dad said he would buy the ticket. Then Mac turned in the job applications so if I let him go to the concert, he could pay me back for any money I spent-- you know, on the off chance that he could go. And he also took out the trash, emptied the dishwasher, vacuumed the living room rug, agreed to paint the shed when it stopped raining, and washed cookie sheets (they don't fit in the dishwasher so they have to be hand washed!).

With all that happening, the stupid check engine light came on in my car so I can't drive three hours to Chicago. Mac appealed to Daddy-O who said YES that I could drive HIS car to Chicago. Mac has a friend who can go. Now it was all up to my and my wallet. Do I have enough money to put gas in Daddy-O's car and pay for food? Am I willing to spend all day hanging around in Chicago? Do I want to give up almost an entire weekend to do this? No, no, no, and no. See, I can type that right here but I can't seem to SAY it to Mac.

I was just thinking about it. I never said yes. But... I thought now it would be BAD to say no. I told Mac if XRay Girl would go with, then I would say yes. (I have friends in Chicago but I had no idea, on short notice, if anyone was free, though I did send an email tonight to see!) She said YES. So Mac, Mac's Friend, XRay Girl and I are taking Daddy-O's car to Chicago on Saturday. While the boys see the concert, she and I are going to do.... something. What I'm not sure, but we'll find something... from 2-11pm.

Of course, I'll be taking a TON of pictures!!!!

And XRay Girl hasn't ever been to Chicago that she can remember in the last 20 years. So we have things we want to do like Chinatown, Watertower, Magnificent Mile, and Navy Pier.

Now, if I said no, then I could stay home with my sullen teenager and feel guilty. So guess what I'm doing on Saturday?

Windy City here we come,
Mags

Oh yeah, and I'll be posting pictures on my traveling blog, which hasn't had any pictures posted on it since I was in Indianapolis, IN last September! (I hope hope hope I can add pictures to this blog this summer!!! I would LOVE LOVE LOVE to go anywhere--- Ireland again? London? regardless, Chicago is a start!)

Happy Freakin' Mother's Day to me...

On Mother's Day I woke up to find my computer had a very wicked Trojan Horse virus thingy called Antispyware Soft, which is supposed to look like your Microsoft virus protector thingy but it is so not. And if you think it's fake, like I did, and click the red X in the corner to make it go away, it actually runs the thing. So I shut it off right away and then I used Daddy-O's computer to see if I could learn anything about this TroHo. What I learned was there is a way to make it go away but I don't understand what I read. Furthermore, there are about 13,845 different instructions to supposedly rid my computer of this thing, but since there are so many choices, I'm a bit skittish on which will really take it away or which will make it worse. Yeah, the virus inventors also post directions on "how to make it go away" and it usually makes it worse. All it does is make me physically ill and really ANGRY!

So, my big plan for Mother's Day, which was to do nothing but drink coffee and catch up on my wonderful bloggy buddies' blogs, since I have been outta da loop for about a week (yes, self induced), was ruined. I couldn't read any. And I hate to take up Daddy-O's computer for hours to just hang out, surfing. And he has a desk top so it's not nearly as much fun and comfort as my usual corner of the couch prone position with my laptop.

Curley's son was supposed to come and fix it Sunday but couldn't so I ended up driving out there last night, to drop it off. Being without my computer, by choice, doesn't bother me; being without it because of some fucking computer virus monster thing just pisses me off!

And my most updated resume is on it as is Microsoft Word, which Daddy-O doesn't have so each time I want to send a resume I need to go to the library. This is not a convenient virus.

He called me later in the evening and said it's fixed! I told him it was like losing my favorite purse or an arm or something; he said it was losing my favorite shoe- I told him to bite his tongue! So I get my 'baby' back tomorrow, thank goodness and can't wait to make sure it's all workin'!

Suffering withdraw,
Maggie Mae

This isn't Victoria's Secret but...

I am the proud owner of the best "underwear" in the world. It makes all my little silky bits of lace and satin, the thongs, the boy briefs, the old fashioned cotton bikinis pale in comparison to the best undies I now own.

I will admit, however, these are NOT sexy underwear. Not even remotely sexy, but they are still awesome. They are available in black, though... and black makes everything seem a little sexier. Right?

Does anyone remember the long ago days of yore when women wore girdles with stays and fasteners and the like? Post corset but pre- "let it all hang out" days? Now, no I can't say I've ever worn an old fashioned girdle at all, but I have worn stockings and a garter belt to help have an unbroken line under a skirt. But that's for another post... AND, most of the time, since I'm so fair skinned (ah, bless me Irish heritage) my legs are pale and I can't seem to tan, I usually wear pantyhose, sometimes the control top kind just because of the instant tummy tuck- can't hurt, and always helps!

Anyway, I have a few clingy skirts and dresses and it's summer so who wants to wear pantyhose all summer long? So the pale legs are going bare (wear shades and deal with the creamy white skin. It's just the way it is!) but what about the instant tummy tuck? What's a girl to do?

I was bemoaning this fact the other day when I went to a clothing shop and the sales lady all but went "psssssst, over here" and flipped open a trench coat. No, she actually pointed me at what was a whole rack of miracle underwear. Called SPANX. While they are not sexy to look at, the name is kinda hot.... but I digress.

So, these panties are nylon and cotton and spandex combined. They can have high a waistband or regular. They also are the style of normal panties, as well as to the knee or the ankle, making them look like leggings- trimmed in lace. So, I bought a pair- the "normal" underwear style.

I about had a heart attack at what I paid for a pair but when I got them home and tried them on... and then put on a skirt that I haven't worn in 2 years and it fit, and the skirt was even too BIG, I knew I had died and gone to underwear heaven. I own one pair but I plan on buying many more.

Ooooooolala, I love me some SPANX!

Big girls don't cry with these panties,
Maggie Mae

Sex and the City 2

So on Friday, May 28 Sex and the City 2 opens. And XRay Girl and I are totally going. Now, XRay Girl is usually up for any adventure, but she is a very down to Earth person. She doesn't usually dress up. And she's not super "girlie". She is a super awesome person but one who doesn't see the need to own lots of pink anything, nor own over 100 pair of shoes. Or a boa. Or a tiara. But I love her anyway.

That being said, I've decided we should have a mini SATC2 party and I threw the idea at her. If she went along with it, I was going to try and convince Curley-- just she is not really sure about this... However, XRayGirl is on board. We're going to glam ourselves up and see the movie then go for drinks. I'm hoping I'll have my pink dress all finished. Then I'm going to wear my 3 inch pink alligator pumps and my boa and get some big hair and a pair of sun glasses and maybe even draw on a beauty mark. Pictures will be forth coming after said event!

Hello, it's a SATC2 event! I think this could be a hoot. I have several girlfriends but not many of them know each other- my friends come from the different areas of my life- or I would get them all together and we could take the theater by storm.

If Gulo were here, I would BEG her to participate- and I think she finally would cave in and do it if it meant I would shut the heck up- since she and I watched SATC on DVDs and drank together when I lived in the Wild West.

As a fan of SATC I think this is a proper way to welcome the movie. Wish you were all here to go with! And chick here for the official trailer- I couldn't get that sucker to embed at a scale that fit my bloggy margins!

Glam Girl Wannabe,
Mags

The accuracy of fortune cookies

The other day XRay Girl and I went for Chinese food and of course we had the complimentary fortune cookie before we left.

Now, I read somewhere that the only way your cookie fortune would come true is if you actually ate a piece of the cookie. Has anyone else heard that part of the lore? Okay, so anyway, I usually never eat a piece of the cookie until I actually read the fortune just in case I got something dumb. I know that's silly but..... I just can't help it.

Since I was with XRay Girl and we were chatting away and I popped a piece in my mouth and then read my fortune, without even thinking. I had already swallowed or I would've spit that sucker right on the floor. My fortune was "Old Friend will come back to you." Now this doesn't SOUND like a bad thing, right? It could be good in a few ways, but to me, old friends resurfacing are never positive- that usually spells trouble. Because those "old friends" are usually of the male persuasion that I slept with. Any other old friends I might have aren't really people I want to see either, but the kicker of that, is usually they don't want to see me either! And there aren't many "old friends" that I don't stay in touch with already someway or another so....

Now if I try and put a positive spin on said cookie's prediction, it could be telling me that DNice is moving back to the Midwest from the Wild West, which is a hellva lot closer, like 2800 miles closer (which is totally awesome!). But I already KNEW this so it's not predicting any sort of fortune! A fortune cookie isn't called a "reinforce what you know" cookie!

Yes, I know this is a freaking fortune cookie, but hello??? Isn't that why we read them!? I do realize it's a good thing all Americans aren't like me with the whole worrying about the fortune cookie thing because then China could be taking over the country, one Asian Buffet at a time.

HERE'S THE THING!!! The very next day, which would be May 6, I get an email from... an old Sam. Damn it! This is a very sexy Sam (for those of you who knew me a long time ago, he was aka 'The Moor'). A very persuasive Sam. A Sam who, while we sort of dated briefly and we used each other more for bootie calls (notice I said each other) than anything else and I haven't heard from him since I was living in the Wild West, out of the clear blue I get an email from this particular Sam. And we shot emails back and forth and I made it clear I am not interested in sleeping with him, he still emails. He's the guy who takes that as a challenge and wants, now, to go out to dinner, dancing, to a movie. He's proposed lots of things, said he'll come to town or we can meet half way between where were live and "hang out" or I can come to his place for a BBQ and watch movies, just as old friends.

Now I've been celibate for over 420 days and I'm not ready to throw that away for just a bootie call. Even though he is hot..................

I knew we should've gone to Applebee's for dinner. Damn fortune cookies.

Love,
"Sister Mary Maggie Mae"

TGIF

Have a nice Friday................................. see you tomorrow!

Swillin' the Cosmos,
Mags

Last minute meme blogging...

I was going to write about underwear but today was a bad day. I will blog about it (either the underwear or the bad day- not sure which) tomorrow. You know the hole I've sorta been in lately? Well, I just feel like it got a little deeper. But because I try to blog every day, here... Thanks Sunday Stealing... I don't know what I'd do without honor among thieves... and trust me, with the day I've had today, this is actually ironic.

Rules: We all are fans. Be it Star Trek or Twilight, you are a fan of something. Pick a subject, book, TV and/or movie series. Now tell us all about it!

1. The first character I fell in love with:
Probably come character as a kid but I don't remember. So, that being said, I fell in love with Atticus Kodiak, a central character in Greg Rucka novels.

2. The character I never expected to love as much as I do now:
Stephanie Plum, a goofy woman who chases people who jump bonds. I thought she was stupid but the more I read of the series, the more I love her and her wacky ways.

3. The character I would shag anytime:
William (played by the incredible Jeffery Dean Morgan) of the film PS I Love You.

4. The character I'd slap:
I go to tv to answer this. That Denozo character on NCIS. I do not watch that show any more because of that character, a total asshole.

5. Who are 3 favorite characters.
Three favorite movie characters: Atticus Finch )played by Gregory Peck) of To Kill a Mockingbird (also a fav book character so he pulls double duty), Charles (played by Hugh Grant) of Four Weddings and a Funeral; and Iris (played by Kate Winslet) from The Holiday.

6. What are my 3 favorite pairings.
Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan (films)
China Bayles and Ruby (book series by Susan Wittig Albert)
Lucy and Ethel (do I need to explain?)

7. Which character I'm most like.
Holly Golightly of Breakfast at Tiffany's, except I'm not a hooker....

8. The coolest thing about the canon:
that it's called 'the canon'

9. The lamest crappiest thing about the canon:
classic books usually suck and are depressing

10. My guiltiest pleasure in this fandom:
House MD, the tv show

11. What story I wish I could read (or art I wish I could see)
I would love to see Gone with the Wind or Breakfast at Tiffany's in a movie theater

12. What story I wish I had written/still want to write:
Girl meets guy, girl marries guy, girl and guy actually live happily ever after... really!

I beg your forgiveness!

This happens to me every few months. I get so busy with work that stuff at home that I can barely keep my head above water and I have no time to do much of anything online.

So I ended up writing a post where I apologize to everyone because I'm a crappy blog buddy. I'm really sorry that I haven't read any blogs for about a week.

Again, the schedule I'm keeping is a busy one right now. Taking my kids to earn their volunteer hours along with school and doing mom stuff just keeps me busy.

I also find when I shut down with blog reading i tend to shut down with friends and family stuff. I just hole up inside myself and don't really do anything with anyone. I mostly just... watch TV. I really don't read, talk on the phone, see friends... nothing. And nothing is wrong, that I know of. It just is something I sometimes do.

I'm really sorry I haven't read your blogs. I also promise that sometime this week I'll be catching up. It can be done. It's just done.... slowly. I miss you all.

Love,
Mags

"Flow it, Show it! Long as I can grow it my HAIR!"~ Hair

If hair hating were an Olympic sport I would win gold medal. I am STILL hating my hair, after the most recent BAD cut that I got a few weeks ago!

Right now, the top layer (can't believe I layers, that stupid haircutting witch) is curling.... outward. Some of the time. Then the other times it's curling--- any damn direction is wants to curl. I hate it. I'm still wearing head scarves and headbands.

Daddy-O HATES the hairbands. Like I care but of course that's in the back of my head every time I put one on.

I put product in and try to use the blow dryer and sometimes it works and other times, not so much. And when it doesn't work, I have three choices: 1) deal with it the way it is; 2) wet it down and start all over again; or 3) place a paper bag on my head.

Today was a really baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaad hair day, can you tell? I had it flipping out on one side of the top layers, and the bottom side of the other side of my head was flipping out. I had a flat section in the front and my sideburns area (where I don't really have any sideburns) were... smushed. NOTHING helped the hair today- the only option was either #3 or go to school looking stupid. Since a paper bag would be considered "distracting to the classroom learning process" according to the handbook, I went with looking stupid.

I hate my hair right now. Really really hate it. I mean I hate my hair so much that if hate were people I'd be China.

Mags

On another note....

Loot in the boot, junk in the trunk... whatever ya wanna call it

Over the last year I've become more self conscious about my body than I have at any other time in my life. I'm a bit heavier than I've been in years, but also because... I think I just feel old. I don't think, other than gaining a little bit of weight, I look any different but sometimes I feel different, if that makes any sense. Maybe it's been a good thing that I've been celibate for 413 days?

I've never been what you might call thin. I used to take dance (ballet AND jazz) when I was in elementary, middle and high school so I was in great shape then. Then I stopped dancing, went off my diet and... then I became curvy like Marilyn Monroe. Now, I'm a bit curvier than that. I've never lost the weight I gained from when my baby was born. And yes, I realize my baby is now 205 months old.

Being over weight is hereditary, you know (I pay attention in 8th grade science!)? And I know that I battle my weight partially because of that. Also, food is important part of my life. My friends and I socialize over dinner and drinks. We have cooks outs together. If there's a shower, a birthday, or a funeral or an illness, we all bring food. We commiserate over broken hearts with pints of ice cream and gallons of margaritas. My mother's side of the family is from the "South." I think the South, by definition, means food. And LOTS of it, so that's how my mom cooked for us as kids and that's the image I mirror. (I think it's some sort of rule or in the Bible that if you are from the South or have Southern heritage, food must be fried, jello molds are mandatory, mushroom soup over anything makes it better, and biscuits are as necessary as air.)

I'm not making excuses for what or how I eat. I'm an educated woman so I know how to eat and cook healthy but these habits are hard to break. If anyone has ever tried to stop smoking, drinking, or using drugs I equate dieting or eating healthy and exercising to this. I really do. People who learn they are diabetic or have to cut out starches or have food allergies... same thing- massive diet and exercise overhaul are rough. In my head my logic is "if the doctor told me I had to stop eating sweets or I would die, I could do that." Why would that make it so? Well, for example, I got that crown on my tooth and I've stayed away from gummy bears, licorice, taffy and anything else that is sticky that might pull it out. I have NO desire to go through that again.

Some of you who know my mom and the circumstances around her death, might ask why that's not an influencing factor. (My mom was very overweight and died from... well, it all came from complications for her uncontrolled diabetes). My answer is that I'm not anywhere close to being as heavy as she was and I have more control than she did. But do I? If I did, couldn't I lose that 20 or 50 pounds?

Changing my lifestyle is what is behind this. People who quit smoking or drinking, while this is HARD HARD HARD and I make no bones about it, don't have to have some alcohol a day to feed their bodies. You can just cut out the booze and smokes FOREVER. No one can just "quit eating" and move on. With food, it's quit eating certain things, quit eating certain amounts of things. It's just CHANGING what you eat, rather than just being able to stop. Sometimes, and I do know this is wrong and I am not making light nor am I making fun for once in my life, but there is a small small small part of me that envies the will power of the anorexic. I think I would do better if I could just STOP cold turkey (see I even use food puns!). But I know it doesn't work that way.

And the bare fact is I can change what and how I eat but I also need to exercise. Proven medical fact that I, in my own lazy way, will not even try and argue with.

No, I'm not grossly disgusting fat, but I'm not some skinny-minny. Yes, people would look at me and think I'm overweight. Not in that frighten children, buy 2 airplane seats way, or anything close like that, but still.

I've had my body complimented by men in the past, kind ones who loved me, so... if the right man comes along, he won't care. I also had a completely platonic male friend of mine tell me I was "made for pleasure not speed" which is something that has made me smile over the years, because it feels so true...

So, this is what was on my mind today...
Maggie

On another note....

Sunday Meme

It's wet and humid and everything feels damp and yucky and I am just not in the mood to do anything, not even blog. I have to do laundry, which will take forever to dry, and I have to go grocery shopping, which sucks most of the time. And I have to go back to school tomorrow though I keep telling myself there's only 21 school days left. I can do ANYTHING for 21 more school days, right? So I went to Sunday Stealing for a meme!

01) Are you currently in a serious relationship?
I have a crush on a person that I've grown to care very deeply for but right now circumstances (mainly distance, timing, and money) prevent us being together, so I don't know if I could call it a "relationship." I know that if he were here or I there, then the answer would be yes.

02) What was your dream growing up?
to be an actress or an awarding willing journalist

03) What talent do you wish you had?
to be able to paint or draw or have perfect pitch

04) If I bought you a drink what would it be?
Cosmo please

05) Favorite vegetable?
green beans

06) What was the last book you read?
The Man Who Loved Books too Much

07) What zodiac sign are you?
Libra

08) Any Tattoos and/or Piercings? Explain where.
Pierced ears- one hole in each, and a tat of a rosebud on my right outer ankle

09) Worst Habit?
over eating

10) If you saw me walking down the street would you offer me a ride?
I don't know you so I might have driven by and not realized it. Sorry!

11) What is your favorite sport?
to play, none. to watch, American Football

12) Do you have a Pessimistic or Optimistic attitude?
Most of the time, I'm very optimistic but on certain things, like finding a job or love I'm rather pessimistic

13) What would you do if you were stuck in an elevator with your best friend?
Laugh and see if we could "Lucy and Ethel" our way out

14) Worst thing to ever happen to you?
Not sure how to answer this one, so I'm not

15) Tell me one weird fact about you.
My second toe is longer than my big toe

16) Do you have any pets?
nope

17) What if I showed up at your house unexpectedly?
I'd let you in so I would finally know who you are and I could then give you a ride if I saw you walking down the street

18) What was your first impression of your best friend?
that she is super nice, kind and generous. and has a great sense of humor

19) Do you think clowns are cute or scary?
Not scary but not cute- interesting or entertaining

20) If you could change one thing about how you look, what would it be?
thin and toned

21) Would you be my crime partner or my conscience?
My role in life usually finds me as a partner in crime

22) What color eyes do you have?
just regular old dark brown

23) Ever been arrested?
nope

24) Bottle or can soda?
I love to drink it out of a glass bottle but it's hard to find, so plastic bottles or cans are just fine

25) If you won $10,000 today, what would you do with it?
give some to Daddy-O, pay off some bills, buy/do something fun, and then bank at least $1000 for Mac's senior year stuff, like graduation, trip, etc...

26) What's your favorite place to hang out at?
bookstores, with friends and family, the couch

27) Do you believe in ghosts?
yes

28) Favorite thing to do in your spare time?
blog, email, read, sleep, watch movies

29) Do you swear a lot?
yes, but I'm trying to cut way back.

30) Biggest pet peeve?
whistling, nail biting

31) In one word, how would you describe yourself?
(right this moment) sleepy

32) Do you believe/appreciate romance?
hmmmmmm, I appreciate it yes; do I believe in it is yet to been seen. Though I guess that answer to that is yes because I keep holding out for the possibility that it will happen so there must be some belief there

33) Favorite and least favorite food?
fav= sweets or pasta.... least fav= hamburgers

34) Do you believe in God?
nope

"You scullion! You rampallian! You fustilarian! I'll tickle your catastrophe!"

The title of this blog post comes from Shakespeare's Henry IV... and I felt this weekend needed to be insulted in a way that the old Bard can only do!

After the craziness that was last night of taking the kids to be volunteers, taking them home, picking up Curley, chatting with Mac about his concert, funeral viewing, dinner, Mac's concert, Curley home and then me home (whew!) I had just planned on vegging the entire weekend. But this two day holiday had other things in mind for my lazy butt!

Mac is taking the SATs today. He has to be at the testing center at 8am. Of course at 11pm last night he announces his calculator needs 4 AAA batteries and he needs two pencils of the non mechanical but number two variety. He also laid a guilt trip on me the size of Texas that I'm a teacher so I know the importance of a good breakfast before a test... blah freaking blah. And the car was on E and the gas light had been on for 3 days. Thank goodness Daddy-O had the needed batteries and since I'm a teacher I had the necessary non- mechanical but #2 variety- pink ones I might add- so haha! And rather than have myself a nice lie in, a lovely morning of laying in bed sleeping in, enjoying a dark gloomy rainy Saturday I was up fixing him breakfast. Yes I love my son but drat!!!! And I accidentally burned the bacon. I did make coffee though! I also gave him money and sent him for fuel for the car while I cooked so all is well. (And I chant: "please please please let him do well so he can get into the University he wants and go to law school and make lots of money and give me some please please please")

I also agreed to go with Curley to her brother-in-law's book signing! I was going to do that anyway but not until later in the day so I'm certainly not complaining about it! Books! Hel-lo?

And I can occasionally have those "dumbass attack" moments as I like to call them. Other have "a-ha" light bulbs flash on brightly but I get "duh" moments as my bulb burns out.... I wrote down my Sisinlaw's baby shower on my calendar for NEXT Sunday rather than when it really is... tomorrow. So I'm going. And again, I am NOT complaining but this is where I get more mad at myself that anything else. I did something dumb with the dates, and now I don't have his (we know the baby is a he) quilt made for tomorrow. I hate it when I'm stupid. Of course I want to go to honor my almost born nephew! I was so glad Sisinlaw and Curley reminded me!

So my restful weekend of being a worthless layabout is no longer. I have plans.

OH.... AND the one day I didn't do a Pink Saturday post, Tiffanee makes a lovely, kind mention of me on her blog! Thank you Tiffanee! So, here is an unofficial Pink Saturday picture!

This is my niece, the Divine Ms K, and this was taken about a year ago. Hey, sometimes you just gotta wear shades!

So, thou art weekend of busy events, you gaphornious villain, go forth for I shall conquer ye!

Mags