Sunday, November 8, 2009

Here today, Gone Tomorrow

I've stayed away from Facebook for LOTS of reasons and one of them is my fear of rejection. Yup, that's right: rejection.

From what I gather, people want to add you as a friend to their pages and I'm afraid no one other than my former high school students will want to friend with me. Or that I'll try and friend someone who will decline my friend request. Or worse yet, someone will add me as a friend and then at some arbitrary point in the future, decide to "UNfriend" me. I just couldn't handle it.

Yes, I realize that is completely silly and probably borderline stupid, but right now with the way my life is arranged, I just don't think I could handle any MORE rejection which I would manipulate into into failure.

All that being said, I've been trying to decide what to do with my little followers sidebar thingy. I like that I have followers- that is so cool, unbelievably flattering, and it frankly makes me feel good. I also get jealous when I go to other blogs and they have more followers than me. Then there's the rejection aspect. I lost a follower the other day. Yup- gone. She just decided to quit following me. I wonder if I offended her, or if she just didn't have time to read me (and if that's the case, why is it ME she doesn't read rather than some other blog?) or it just didn't suit her fancy or whatever. See, rejection. I LIKE seeing there are people who choose to be my friend (to quote Bragger!) but it makes me sad when they leave, so I've wondered if I should just omit it and deal.

I want to thank everyone who follows officially and unofficially. I also appreciate your comments and just knowing there are people out there in the great wide world who make time in your busy lives to see what's up with me is amazing, and I thank you. Check out the bloggers in my sidebar who are followers; there are some talented writers in there.

And welcome to all those new followers, who've signed up and those who choose to read! Welcome to my world. I'm glad you're here.

(an aside: I like saying 'followers'; it's so very guru like. Ah, the directions I could go with this.)

And the purpose of this post? Well...... honestly, it probably could've just been a point on a bulleted list of randomosity, but I'm trying to really blog real stuff during this "national blog every day" month and not resort to memes and Johnny D pictures. And lately I'm struggling with feelings of failure and I also lost a follower all at the same time- illogical rationalization I realize but right now I'm sweating the small stuff.

Okay, I'm done. I'm gonna go eat gummibears.



Evil Pixie said...

You're not alone. I'm on Facebook and every-so-often I noticed that my Facebook "friends" number shrinks. First thoughts are: What the hell?!?!? Who did I piss off this time?

In the end, I realize it is okay because I have a difficult enough time keeping track of all my "friends." However, rest assured... if you were on Facebook - I'd be your friend. :)

Maggie said...

Evil P- the Facebook thing is crazy that it would bother me and I don't even Facebook. My god, I have GOT to get a life!

And thank you for being my Facebook friend if I Facebooked- I'd have one, and that's plenty!

(Thanks following here!)

Anonymous said...

I have Facebook and forget about it. I don't understand the fascination. People are working on farms and taking weird polls. I've become friends with people who request my friendship and that's it. I delete a lot of crap. I respond and then hear nothing! Go to my Facebook page. I don't think YOU have to signup to be my friend. Crazy.


PS I'm sending an email

Jimmie Earl said...

Exactly why I deleted myself from Facebook! It's just another way to at STRESS to your life in my opinion. Who needs it? Besides, I was getting "friend requests" from people I went to college and HS with that I don't even remember. Who needs that? If I wanted to be "friends" with those people, I would have kept in touch with them over the last 46+ years! Ugh! That's why I think "class reunions" are STUPID! But, that's fodder for another day.

Maggie said...

P- got the email and will be answering either yet tonight or tomorrow evening- Mac is here so who knows what I'll have time for?

And as for Facebook and obsession, I know what you mean! Some people I know are completely absorbed with it all the time. They have to change their status ALL THE TIME, they have to read the wall, make comments, blah blah blah. I know some very smart folks who have taken this on like OCD like proportions.

I also hate it when people say stuff about all their "friends" they interact with with in Facebook. I'm thinking of 3 men I know specifically-- they talk about all their FRIENDS, who are people they interact with strictly and solely on Facebook and haven't seen for years. But they claim these people are their friends, when they just share a comment on Facebook occasionally. I dunno. I just worry about this is doing to our society.

JE- okay! Tell it like it is! you go! I agree with the if i wanted to be friends i wouldn't stayed friends thing.

Shan said...

It does seem strange to unfollow someone. I don't really get how following helps one follow. I use a feed reader to know what's going on and just click follow if I in fact want to follow someone.

I think you have a healthy supply of followers and should be quite happy with it. I have had a solid 16 for quite sometime now. ;)

I hate feeling insecure about stuff. Believe me I can go there several times a month. It is a rotten feeling. I thing you should go on fb because we could keep up better over there and see pics and such! DO IT!!

Maggie said...

Shan- I am VERY(!) happy with the number of followers I have. it's awesome and I love them all!

And it is weird to "unfollow" I agree.

I think "following" helps one follow because it lists the last time they post 9or the most current post) on your dashboard, at the bottom. Or at least that's how mine is laid out.

And you make a good argument for Facebook, but I'm just not ready to go there! (other reasons other than rejection that I don't Facebook: I'm neurotic and it could become an unhealthy habit for me like an OCD, I blog therefore I have enough to keep up with, I would spend my time hunting for ex boyfriends and that isn't healthy, and Mac wouldn't friend me.) :)

Anonymous said...

Sounds like we have a new twist on the old philosophical classic:

I blog, therefore I am............
Maggie O'Sullivan


Maggie said...

P- you have a point!

Anonymous said...

just wanted to say i love your blog

i have not been able to read lately but i do really love it

sorry my shift key is broken and i am typing badly lol.

Maggie said...

Hi anon... glad you like it! Sorry to hear about your shift key! thanks for reading and I'm glad to know you're back!