Wednesday, August 4, 2010

Not the sharpest tool in the shed

Now many of you may know this and if you do, you are much smarter and much better people than I am, obviously. If you didn't know this, then learn from my mistakes.

I used Mozilla as my web browser. I like it. Everyone has their own preferences and I just happened to like Mozilla. So several months ago, I decide to delete the Big Blue E from my computer. Yes my friends, I decided to delete Microsoft Explorer. I never used it and it was just sitting there taking up a huge amount of space. I thought I was freeing up space and making my life easier. I went through the whole "uninstall" thingy and even though it kept giving me a million warnings, I deleted that sucker anyway.

And for a few months everything was fine. Occasionally something wouldn't work or there was quirk or something odd but nothing that was really that bad. And I didn't really know WHY it was glitching. I thought it was just my computer or that I had a virus or something. Then I noticed that none of the add-ons I added would work. Then my MSN instant messenger program failed to work. And then the other day my computer auto set itself up to do something and I couldn't make it undo it.

So I went to ITSam and he started poking around and very nicely and calmly asked me where my Microsoft Explorer was. I casually said, "I deleted it because I use Mozilla." Dead silence. Utter and complete and total dead silence.

I can literally SEE the gears in his brain working. I can see his jaw moving and no sound. He got control and then very quietly (almost too quietly) and nicely said, "ummmm, honey, that does a little more than just act as a browser. You kinda need it for other stuff." I ask if that's why stuff has been going wrong and he says yes. Oh.

Then he starts poking around and muttering and looking and clicking... and he nicely and calmly tells me he's going to back up every single thing on my hard drive and will then have to restore the factory settings. And then he'll reinstall everything.

Oh. My. Goddess. And he wasn't kidding.

He nicely and calmly explained, without making fun or me or making me feel stupid, that while Microsoft Explorer is a browser it is also hard wired into the inner workings of my computer and to all the user systems. Or something like that. It was technical. I sort of glazed over but the big picture is that deleting it is bad and that Bill Gates somehow makes it necessary to have The Big Blue E on all computers whether you want it there or not, or your computer will slowly self destruct. That's what I got out of ITSam's explanation, anyway.

So I said to him, "Um, if you were just some random IT guy who wasn't dating me that I called on a customer service help line, and told you what I did, after you fixed it, you and all the other IT guys would get together and compare stories of the dumbest customers of the day. And when you got to tell about the lady who deleted her Microsoft Explorer, you would win dumbest customer award, wouldn't you?" He grinned and said "yes, but I love you anyway."

Damn blue E,


Evil Pixie said...

Hahahaha! The visual you created with describing your interaction with ITSam has me cracking up. But don't worry Maggie Mae... we've all been there. Even ITSam - at one point. :)

Lisa said...

YOu know I tried and my computer told me not to so I think I quit. I have it on my new one and have to use it occasionly otherwise I really don't like it Bing is for the birds! Glad you are up and running again and you CAN delete the short cut from the desk top with no issue if you don't want to see it ;) It will still be on your start up menu if you need it! Glad you have a good guy there! If he has good friends PLEASE send them my way ;)
Hugs, Lisa

Maggie said...

Evil P- I had no idea it was that important. Sometimes stupid is as stupid does...

Lisa- first, you were the smart one who heeded the warning! I have no idea why I thought it would be a good idea... I'm never touching the Big Blue E again. Damn it.

I hate Bing, too. it's stupid and frustrating. Give me good old Google any day, please!

And right now none of ITsam's good friends are single but I'll keep watching! :)

sam said...


I use Swagbucks. Makes money for me as I search for things. Glad you got it fixed!!! I called the other day, haven't had a chance to call back.


Evil Pixie said...

I couldn't agree more with the Bing comments. Bing must die!!

Bragger said...

Wait....he said "I LOVE you anyway"? Did you forget to tell us something?

This ought to make you feel better....I got an email from an organization of which I was a member. It had an attachment named "bug". Yeah, I opened it. Wiped out my school-provided laptop. Including my dissertation. At least I wasn't stupid enough not to back THAT up.

Maggie said...

sam- sorry I've missed your calls. It's been a week of utter and total crazy here!

Evil P- down with bing!

Bragger- ah yes... the "L" word. It's been used. I think I might have neglected to mention that. Between the L word and trying on engagement rings, it's been a busy week here. :)

And I would've opened a file called "bug" if it came from someone I knew. I'm that trusting. But now, I'll think twice.