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Saturday, June 26, 2010

Pink Saturday presents: Mothers and Sons

There's a special relationship between mothers and sons. The other day Mac said something about when he's an adult he'll be in his own home and he'll think, "what would mom do in this situation" and then he'll go do it, like fix dinner or do laundry. What got me was the whole "I'll do what mom would do" part.

I'm a mom first. I make the tough decisions and hard choices. I ground him when necessary. I make sure he does chores. I nag. I'm often the mom AND the dad. I can't just be the good guy; darn the part of parenting that makes me have to set and enforce rules!

But Mac is a pretty easy kid to parent at age 17. (Should I knock on wood?) So far I've been especially blessed to have very few problems with him. Most of the time I can be the fun mom. The mom who can play video games, share a pizza, see a movie, be silly, go for coffee, giggle over stupid jokes, tease, laugh, talk, debate, and just generally be laid back.

He goes to college next fall. My baby will go to college. I keep looking at my Daytimer, and counting the days. He's my son and sometimes he's a buddy. But no matter what he's my baby. What do people do when their only child goes away to school? Oh I know he's not gone yet, but still it sticks in my head. I'm a single mom, and not prospects to get married or be a couple and my only kid will be doing his own thing. I want him to go, have a great time at school, succeed, live his own life, but how in the world do I let go? Damn that passing time...

What am I going to do with all my time? Can I move to his college town? Okay, I know I can't but it's crossed my mind. I worry when he goes to the movie with a friend. What am i going to do when I go for weeks and not be able to see him, to check on him, to make sure he has clean laundry, does his homework, cleans his room so his roommate doesn't kill him?

Thankfully I have a year to figure it out.

Maggie Mae

(Don't forget to visit Beverly for more Pink Saturday at How Sweet the Sound. And visit fellow pink blogger and mom Tiffanee at two of her blogs. She author's One Crazy Cookie with fabulous food, great and easy recipes, and fabulous money saving ideas!!! And she chronicles her wonderful family on a positive and heartwarming blog called A Crazy Wonderful Life!)


And on that note...

24 comments:

debbie said...

HAPPY PINK SATURDAY MAGGIE,
WHAT A BEAUTIFUL POST...VERY TOUCHING.
I LOVE THAT WATCH.
HUGS AND BLESSINGS
SIMPLY DEBBIE

Sherry from Alabama said...

What a sweet post. My baby is going to college in the fall too. I have homeschooled my three children for the past 16 years, so it is kind of my retirement. Blessings to you and Happy Pink Saturday.

Sherry @ A Happy Valentine

Theresa said...

I feel your pain:) Our babies growing up is bittersweet. Very sweet post and wishing you a Happy Pink Saturday!

Vintage French Hen said...

Hi Maggie, Very sweet pink posting. I know exactly what you mean. I have my only son in Iraq, and every time he boards that plane I can hardly stand it. My parents are in their 80's and they tell me to this day that they still worry about all us kids. You are always a parent, will always be concerned for your children's safety no matter how you are! I wouldn't change it for the world. Marcia

Nan said...

Maggie you will move on and your son will bring more blessings to your family someday in the not to distance future. He will marry and you will have a baby to love !! It happens so fast, now my grandkids are bringing wives into our family, no babies yet but I'm sure in the future that will come. I have just two children and only one has children, two boys so our family is pretty small. When we're all together however we need a larger house !!
~Nan~

Tracy F. said...

Sweet post! My "baby boy" is 28! That doesn't stop me from mothering him, though---sometimes, much to his dismay.

Jacalyn @ rmebathproducts.com said...

Oh Maggie you will survive when he goes to college! This is your time to focus more on what you want! I know because I am doing the same thing right now!

Happy PS,
Jacalyn

Marsha (Sassy Mini Dolls) said...

Happy Pink Saturday!!

Oh, boy, I remember that movie! That was a LONG time ago!!!

I would love to have a claw foot tub!!!

Thank you for stopping by!!!

xxoo

Maggie said...

Debbie- thanks. and the watch came from Cracker Barrel of all places!

Sherry- good luck with the fall. at least i have one more year- yikes. and congrats on your 'retirement'! ;)

Theresa- thank you!

Marcia@ Vintage French Hen- Iraq? Oh wow- the fact you aren't in a funny farm is amazing because I would be. I feel like an idiot for whining about him going to college a few hours from me.... bless you AND you son!

Nan- he's going to be an amazing adult since he's a fab kid, but wow. thanks for the kind words.

Tracy- i tell Mac he'll always be my baby and he just rolls his eyes and smiles. heehee

Jaclyn- good for you! and that's a good outlook!

Marsha- love that movie, myself!

thanks everyone for your thoughtful and kind comments!!!

That shabby Pink Girl said...

Hi Maggie
I know just how you are feeling I have all boys, and when the last one went to College, I thought I might not make it, I drove with him to the college, hours away. me in my car with his clothes, and he in his pickup with the big stuff.
I cried so hard when I left him there, and I could not make it all the way Home, I had to stop and get a Motel room, my eyes were swollen almost shut, Cold washcloth on my eyes all night, so I could finish going Home.
We laugh about it today! Thanks for sharing your story.
Have a great wkend.
marian elizabeth

Dogmom Diva said...

Hi Maggie, not so long ago I was going through the very same thing wth my younger son..it was just wierd to not have him around! But as time went on I got used to it. He has lived away from us by about 500 miles for almost 8 years, he is married now..I miss him daily,but as much as I love both my sons, I don't want them IN my house lol. You get used to it, believe me!


Barb

Kdottie Designs said...

Oh, Maggie ~ I know what you are going through. I too have an only child. She graduated in 2004 and was on her way to Loyola in Chicago (we live in St. Louis) but instead was chosen to join the performing group,The Young Americans. So plans changed and she moved to California. Oh Lord, that was hard. She lived there a year, moved to Michigan to perform in their dinner theatre and then went on tour to Europe for three months, and then on tour through the east coast of US. She then left the group - moved to NYC then back to CA. She then went to the Paris Fashion Institute in France. We have been able to visit her in all these wonderful places : )

You NEVER quit worrying - it is so hard but my Mom always said you gave her roots now you have to give her wings.

I think it is really hard to let go of any child but when they are your only one - I think it's worse (especially if you are very close).

Enjoy this last year of his high school - it will go SO fast.

Caren

Lisa McDonald said...

Happy Pink Saturday

Love the watch and the planner, very cute!

Couture de Papier said...

Thank you for sharing lovely post.I love your pics and the pinks! That movie is a classic... HPS!

The Happy Homemaker said...

Awww, so bittersweet.You are so right.There are times when I wish I could just stop the clock and save them exactly as they are...

The Quintessential Magpie said...

What a sweet post, and I understand why he said when he was away and living on his own he'll think, "I wonder what Mom would do?" Me thinks that you have been a wonderful mother to that young man and formed such a strong bond that you won't have to worry about him because he is truly his mother's son.

And what are you going to do when he's gone? Why blog of course, silly! ;-)

Happy Pink Saturday and warm hugs...

XO,

Sheila :-)

Maggie said...

Marian- I'm afraid that's gonna be me! Ack!

Barb- I'll get used to it? Okay, if you say so!! LOL!

Caren- it sounds so wonderful for her, all those great places, and nice you could see her in all those spots, but wow, so far way! But I want him to follow his bliss, ya know?

Lisa and Couture- thanks!

Happy Homemaker- I know, right?

Magpie- Oh gee, thanks so much for your nice, kind words. It's like a verbal hug!

And blog? Well, I never thought of that! haha! :)

Riet said...

What a lovely story. I had four sons and I worried about all of them. They are all over 40 now but they wil always be my children and I will always be their mom.
Happy belated pink Saturday

someplace in thyme said...

Our son is now 33 years old and I have no idea where the time went. We are as close as ever. It's tough being a parent, but just look what happens when you aren't doing your job. Great post, Happy Pink Saturday, Char

Mary said...

What a pretty day planner and watch, Maggie. Happy Pink Saturday~

Regina said...

Hello Maggie. Love your planner and your pretty watch.
And I understand you so well. It crossed my mind too.
Happy Pink Saturday ( belated).

Have a great week ahead.
" Regina "

Vicki said...

Hi, Maggie,
I have been in your shoes, a single mom and my youngest son, my baby, going off to college. You will survive and get into your own routine, but he will always be your baby and you will miss him. I enjoyed your post very much, and it brought back a lot of memories for me. It is wonderful that you and your son have such a close relationship. I am close to both of my sons and it is hard to let them sprout those wings and fly. However, they will always fly back home occasionally for a fun visit. Of course now, I am also blessed with two daughters in law and six grandbabies. God bless you, Maggie! Vicki

Self Sagacity said...

Yes. I am going through detachment as my oldest son is going to college. Will have a post about his graduation on Tuesday, hope you can come by and share with me then. :-)

Jimmie Earl said...

I had a coffee mug once that said: "Parenthood: the hardest, yet most rewarding job you will ever have." I believe it! Even at the ages you and your brother are, I will always be your dad. With that goes concern and worry. It's just a natural phenomenon. You will survive! I did!
Love ya,
Dad