Sunday, August 28, 2011

Adventures in babysitting

My dad and I always laugh about an episode of Designing Women, which was one of our favorite shows. The women are decorating the Governor's mansion (in Georgia) and the Gov.'s assistant is Ms. Bets. Through hijinks, one of the girl's gets her head stuck in a banister and Ms. Bets goes crazy!

This always reminds me of a time when I was in high school and I was babysitting. I had a few regular clients that I took care of on a regular basis. One family had 2 little girls and they weren't my favorite little kids. They were scream-y and whiny. They were close together in age, like 3 and 2. They were a real handful- makes me glad I never had 2 kids, nor had girls.

So one night I was there and the youngest little girl was calling for help with the "potty." The oldest was sitting in front of the TV and hadn't moved in a half an hour so I left her sit and went to the bathroom. About 30 seconds passed- I'm not kidding, 30 seconds tops- and I hear screaming from the living room. I grab the youngest under one arm (In only her pajama top and socks since we were in the process of putting on clean, dry, accident free panties) and ran to the living room.

There was the oldest... with her head stuck in an end table. The end table had a small piece on the top, fastened to the larger bottom- a stair step table. And that little dickens had her bloomin' head stuck in between the 2 pieces. Oh for Pete's sake!!!

I have no idea how the child did that. None.

I set her half nekkid sister on the floor and try to just tug her little head out and she screamed. She was really stuck. I thought I was gonna have to go VanGogh and cut off an ear. I tried to wiggle her around and she couldn't come loose. I try to turn her head and shake the table, and nada. I thought about taking the table apart but that wasn't possible- I laid on the floor under it and couldn't see any hardware to unfasten, or unscrew. I'm trying to get her free and calm her down at the same time, but I was really starting to panic, and I felt bad for the child, too.

Great. The parents were gonna come home and find a kid with her head stuck; I bet I wouldn't get paid. And of course, the kids is screaming the whole time. The nekkid one wondered over to the tv and sat down to watch.

I finally called my mom & dad.

Dad finally came over to the house. Now, by this time she's had her head stuck for about 30 minutes and the screaming stopped. She was kneeling there, and eating Cheerios. Go figure.

Dad came in and he tried to pull the kids loose, and it didn't work. Dad just jiggled the table and took hold of the top portion of the table and gave it a hard yank. It came off in his hands and the kids was free. She ran over and sat in front of the tv with her sister like nothing happened. Geez.

Apparently the tabletop was just glued fast and when dad gave it a yank, it popped free.

I don't remember what the parents said when I got home and told 'em what happened.

But I do remember they called me to sit again a few weeks later. And lo' and behold, the next time I sat that little brat did it again! And that was the LAST time I watched those kids.


No comments: