Updates on... pretty much everything

Pizza Guy
No word on the pizza guy. I've been to the pizza place and he's never there. Curley knows someone who knows someone who works there and is going to see what she can find out.

Penis-mobile
I finally talked to Buddy 2's mom and she was rude. Yeah, like she has any room to be rude to me! Anyway, she said she will pay for the damage. So now I have to go get quotes. This is a pain in the ass. I'm tempted to leave the damn penis on there and keep the money since she was a bitch. I'm sorry, but she was. And do you know she not once apologized for her kid. Had it been in reversal I would've apologized up a storm. Oh well.

Mac
He's either going to sing "I'm Yours" or "21 Guns" at the Spring Choral concert. However!!!! He wondered what would happen if he did "I kissed a Girl" (Kat Perry) in drag.... I promise a video clip of WHATEVER he does!!!!!

AlaskaSam
No word on whether Vegas is gonna happen. He told me to "sit tight and hang on". This can mean 3 things: no trip will happen, we're going to do something better which will knock my socks off, or.... to sit tight and hang on while he arranges stuff. Men!

Dentist:
I went to get my crown and it didn't fit so I have another temporary crown and will go back to get the "real"- hopefully- on March 18. And I am getting my teeth cleaned then. I went to the oral surgeon who thinks he's Mr. Cool and is not not, by the way. he worse gold chains and had a fake bake tan. ICKY! Be that as it may, I'm having TWO wisdom teeth pulled on March 30.

And that's all the news that's fit (or not so fit) to print!

Mags

Is the plural of penis peni?

Farrago (I bet he's wondering how he's drug into a post with THIS title) mentioned the Craigslist website and something called meet-ups over on his blog. I read about his success and great experiences & I thought this sounded like fun. The way he described it was like single folks meeting at places for outings- dinners, shows, museums, etc. I moved back here and thought I would see if North Civilization had such an activity on Craigslist.

I Googled it and click all the right city info and events and such. And guess what I get when I hunt for meet-ups in my area? Pictures of penises- lots and lots of penises.

After being slightly embarrassed and mortified, I became sort of intrigued. It was like a bad car accident and I couldn't look away. I mean, after seeing about 10 pictures of penises, I was sort of desensitized by the actual "members." (side note- I think penises just prove that if there was a God she had a sense of humor through the creation of the penis. They are JUST not attractive. Useful, yes. Most of the time pleasurable if used correctly, yes. Pretty- NO!!) But I became more interested the actual wording of their "ads" for meet-ups.

First, I think these guys are shameless and wacko. They will be the ones who leave your dead body in a seedy motel room he's rented by the hour. He'll use the skin of your body for his costume. Lotion in the bucket, anyone? The scary factor aside, though...

This was hilarious! Penises everywhere! Of course they were all erect and these guys have no idea what women are gonna think of as hot... First, if you're going to take a picture of your penis and post it on the Internet, the least you could do before shooting the picture is to kick your dirty underpants off the floor and out of the way. Or don't take a picture of your wang with a stack of kids' board games piled in the background. Or a cluster of WEDDING PICTURES on the shelf behind you!!!!!! And have these guys heard of trimming the forest? PLEASE! A hirsute is nasty!

And they say things like "I don't even want to know your name, I just want to f*** you..." or "married man looking for secret fun" or "Handsome 66 year old man looking for an 18-21 year old female to spoil, spank and fondle- light S&M to be expected" and he had a picture of his dong and his naked, red, saggy, recently spanked, wrinkly, old man ass. NO! And NSA means "no strings attached" if you answer an ad... OMG- wrong, wrong, wrong.

So, of course I have to tell Hecate about this and she sends me a link to a blog site called Desperately Seeking... Something? The creators of this site have taken the nasty penis shots from Craigslist, compiled them onto a blog, and wrote their own captions... OMG! This is some seriously funny stuff! It's adult content- you have been warned.

Moral of this story- Craigslist is scary, that many penises on a web page are scary, and never trust Farrago. By the way, I still don't know the answer to my original question that titled this whole post!

There are times when being blind wouldn't be so bad,
Maggie