Think Kit day 13: funny!

Think Kit: When did you laugh out loud? Share a funny or humorous story from this year.

 This is one of those moments wher you might have to be there for it to be funny but...

My friend Baby Girl and I met in the library one morning and we looked like collective Hell. Neither of us had been hanging out the night before and come to find out that neither of us had been drinking. SHE was babysitting for a 9 month old until about midnight. Then her BF had called her at 2 am and had locked his keys in the car in the parking lot where he worked and his second shift just ended- could she please come get him? At his job 45 minutes away... Which she did. I was up late grading papers and then Mac called me in the middle of the night with his problems. And then when I fell back to sleep, the dog woke up and wanted out. So--- we were tired-- which also makes us easy to be punchy and maybe things aren't really as funny as we thought...

So when she took a drink of Cherry Pepsi and missed her mouth and it ran down her chin, and I snot laughed over it and we both went "ewwwwwwwww" at the same time, we giggled again. Then we attempted to high five each other because we said "ewwwwwww" at the same time and we missed the high five. And because we're not so classy to turn a failed high-5 into a low hand slap, we snorted laughed and made "duh" sounds. At which point my principal asked if we were okay as he walked by the library door.  Like little children we immediately stopped laughing and got straight faced and said we were fine.

He kept walking and we took one look at each other and burst out laughing like idiots. And then I tried to sit down on my rolling chair which shot out behind me, I missed and landed on the floor. When Baby Girl figured out I was okay and was laying there laughing, howling, she was gasping for air and... well, as you can see it was just a series of KeyStone Cop moments that weren't that funny...

But I have to say it was a way to turn a bad night and what seemed like a crummy morning into something funny. It was a great way to start the day with huge giggles, guffawing and lough belly laughs with a friend. can't be all bad, right?

Laughter is the best medicine,
Maggie

Day 2 of the 30 day challenge: Something you Love About Yourself

I'm taking a 30 day blog challenge and today is day 2. More truth about Maggie, so here goes!

Something You Love about Yourself:

I love my sense of humor. Once, a long time ago, a friend of mine said: "never be afraid to go for the funny." And I've remembered this always and i usually go for it. Sometimes I find that something comes out my mouth and isn't nearly as funny as it was when it was in my head. But MOST of the time, something funny is something funny.

And if I find I have an engaged audience, I can do what seems to be a stand-up comic routine. I think it's why I enjoy teaching so much-- I have an audience that is forced to listen to me, I get to be the center of attention and be funny.

In all seriousness, I do like to make people laugh. I try to do it here on my blog and I try to do it in real life. It might be just because I want to make someone smile because they need it or sometimes, because I need it. I like to hear a chuckle or a chortle or, best of all, a big, huge belly laugh.

Laughter heals, it's the best medicine, and all that ballyhoo. So I like my sense of humor to find the funny in big and small ways, and to try and give others a chuckle for a day.

Mags

Return of the killer spider, and other arachnid tails

Do you remember back in April when I wrote about the huge big spider that tried to eat me and the entire laundry room but when it knew Mac was hunting it because I was hysterically sobbing in fear of its huge-ness, it ran away and was never seen again? I think it was a killer spider. Seriously.

Well, vindication is mine, so saith Maggie- and on so many levels. Everyone thought I was exaggerating the size of the killer spider. Everyone made fun of me and teased me, even though it was really big. And I was really scared it would bite me- and spider bites are dangerous. But Daddy-O and Mac made fun and didn't believe me and I was hurt and pissed.

So, last week Mac and ITSam (who I wasn't dating at the time of the spider spotting but heard the stories and doesn't believe me either!) were waiting for me to come out of the bathroom so we could go somewhere (I always pee the very last thing before I leave the house, even if I'm just going to Wal-Mart and don't even have to really go. Anyway...) I picked up a towel Mac left on the floor and out of the corner of my eye I see movement and I hear, on the other side of the bathroom door, cries of "holy shit!", "Oh My God, do you see that thing?", "What the fuck is that?", and then, "MOM do NOT come out of the bathroom." )That last one was from Mac)

Apparently, the killer spider made its return and scared the shit outta Mac and Sam who were trying to figure out how to kill it. I'm on the other side of the bathroom door listening to all this, hoping to all deities that this time it gets killed. (Okay I wasn't exactly on the other side of the door. I was standing in the bathtub in case in ran back in to attack me. But I could still hear from there!)

First they had to talk about how huge it was. It was an "epic" sized spider, it was a "huge ass" spider, was was a "mutant" spider. Then it moved, apparently, and they both screamed like little girls and there was a great amount of stomping and swearing. They both deny it but I'd wager money that they were standing on dining room chairs, hand to Goddess!

Sam was in sandals and Mac was in flip-flops so they were both freaking out over who was going to stomp it or how it would die. It was determined and Mac went and put on snow boots. He came back and there was more shrieking and screaming; apparently it moved and was headed toward THEM!

Now, consider this. These two guys are supposed to be my rescuers, screaming in a voice that only dogs could hear? These 2 big guys, one wearing snow boots, are scared of my spider. Well, hell, no wonder I had nightmares if these dudes are frightened! And it moved toward them and they still run from it. And I'm trapped in the bathroom, oscillating between terror and hysterical laughter.

So, finally Mac decided he "had the balls" to kill it. He ran toward the spider, with Sam screaming "it's on the go, headed right toward you!" (I have no idea if he was referring to Mac or the spider or to whom he was speaking, to Mac or the spider). Finally, when he stepped on it, crying :got you mutherfu****", the spider's actual guts popped out and it was a hairy, bloody smear all over the laundry room floor. Both guys had the heebee-jeebees from it, prancing from foot to foot, convulsing with the full body shivers.

I refused to clean it up on the grounds that it was the biggest spider I had ever seen- TWICE, and since no one believed me, someone else was scrubbing up spider guts. Mac used 409 and Windex on his boot, and the floor. I think he used about a million paper towels and swore he was going to need a shower.

Yeah, my heroes. Sheesh!

Maggie

Christmas Humor

"You Shall Name Him..."

The three wise men kneel before the new baby lying in the manager, with his parents Mary and Joseph. They placed the gifts around the babe.

As one stood up, he whack his head on a cross beam and yelped out "Jesus Christ that hurt!"

Mary turns to Joseph and says. "Jesus Christ? Oh Joseph, that's a great name. I like it so much better than Herbie!"

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Three Wise Women

You do know what would have happened if it had been three wise WOMEN instead of three wise men, don't you?

They would have asked for directions, arrived on time, helped deliver the baby, cleaned the stable, made a casserole, and brought practical gifts.

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