What are you reading?

I've struggled with how to start this post or even what direction to take it. Part of me wants to say "do people read anymore?" because I don't know a lot of people who do that I can have conversations with about books. Or could say "Why aren't people reading stuff that is similar to what I read?" Or "why don't my friends and family read books I'd like?". And that could also leave them asking "well, why don't you read things WE like?" which is a good question BUT this post is about me and my reading habit, not yours. And I say that in jest and with good humor, you guys!

I miss being around people who share the same interests in reading what I read, or who have a diverse taste in books so we can have conversations about literature. I do not mean that to sound all smarmy or snotty or intellectually bitchy. My friends and family are smart and witty and fun, which are a few reasons why I love them. But we don't have a lot in common in the literary world. There's nothing wrong with that at all, but I just miss a stimulating conversation or debate about books and reading, best sellers, authors, context and characterization, new releases, and the merits of classics or anything other sort of strange bibliophile conversation.

Reading is essential to me as food and air and sleep; heck, sometimes I even sacrifice those things FOR books. And I love to talk about things I read. Daddy-O, bless his heart, will listen to me ramble or rage or tear on about a book; I'm so thankful he will hear me out and give an ear to my words about something I read, even if he doesn't give a hoot. I'm lucky and thankful he indulges me. And though he reads tons of stuff, we rarely read the same sorts of books. Which is fine. It just doesn't lend itself to a bookish conversation.  

One of my favorite things to ask is "what are you reading" and I hope for 1) a great book recommendation; and, 2) a stimulating conversation. I love the whole "oh I read that! What did you think of SoandSo?" and then we're off and running.

Daddy-O says what I read is intellectual/ smart stuff (I think he really means "weird") but I think I just read what I like, which is fairly diverse. He and I had the conversation that since I work where I work I don't often have a chance to flex my brain and engage in smart conversation or to have my brain motivated and all the synapses firing so he thinks I have to read "smart" stuff- chewy books so I can get my smart on/ turn on my brain.  I don't know about all that but it's as good as an explanation as any, I'd say.

But these days it's just not happening for me. There's no clicking for me, with other people, when talking about books lately. I miss book-ish conversation.

Mags

Cooties!

Daddy-O went on his annual snowbirding trip to the Lone Star state. He left last Friday and will be gone around 2 weeks- the spring thaw; whenever he feels the need to come home. So until then, I have the house to myself! Whoot-whoot! go me!

However, Mother Nature has had different plans for me for the first week of my solo single girl life running the house. While I thought I'd be doing my thing: cooking, listening to music at top volume, watching movies and TV shows he would hate, having the girlfriends over for supper or movie nights, instead, it's been a totally different experience.

I have had the flu. Or one hellva cold.

I got home a week ago today from taking him to the train station. I got to the house at 10:30pm LAST Friday night and didn't leave the house until noon on Wednesday when I thought I felt well enough to go back to work. And frankly, that wasn't even the case. I felt guilty that my students didn't have new library books and I feel guilty when I miss that much work. So I went.

But since waking up last Saturday I've felt terrible. My ears hurt, my throat was sore, I have a runny nose, cough, congestion, aches, pains, upset stomach "issues", eyes were aching and scratchy, and just felt crummy all over. The only thing I didn't have was a fever.

And today the ears don't hurt but I still have all the other stuff. I was planning to substitute teach today and undecorate the office for Christmas tomorrow and work my part time weekend receptionist job this weekend and ow.... blech.

All I am doing is laying on the couch until I have to go to the receptionist job at 4pm. There will be no decoratinung and there was no subbing.

I'm working on my 3rd box of Puffs. I've drank tons of cups of tea, 7-up, and coffee. Nyquil is my friend as is Tylenol.

And this whole week there was nothing fun but laying on couch and sleeping or watching crap TV. (Okay, I did watch some "good TV"; I finally caught up on all the stuff I've DVR-ed over the last 5 months, so I guess we could say I did accomplish something.) My eyes hurt so much that I didn't even want to read. I felt so crappy that I couldn't concentrate, anyway. I didn't watch movies either because I couldn't concentrate that long. I have the fireplace on and the dog and I just lay here. I hope he can't get sick...!

I bet Daddy-O is glad he hasn't been here for the 'sick girl' experience. Hell, I'm the sick girl and I don't want to be here. Ugh!

I hope everyone is feeling well and healthy, though! I wouldn't wish this stuff on anyone!

Sniffly, stuffy,
Mags

Out of sorts about Mac being out of sorts

Sometimes when I see Mac I feel all out of whack afterwards. He's my son and I love him but I never know how a visit with him is going to go and sometimes, frankly, I dread these visits.

Sometimes he's great: happy, go-lucky, jovial, funny, charming and just full of personality. Other times he's mean, arrogant, and just a real SOB. Then there are the third times, which are like tonight.

He's tired and seems down. He doesn't really complain about stuff but drops enough breadcrumbs that something isn't entirely right. I never know what to do in that situation. I try not to push the issue because I'm not sure I want to know the answers but then I feel guilty. I dunno.

Mac appears to be working hard to get his shit together. He works LOTS of hours, taking on more than he's scheduled. Other than that, I'm not sure what's happening in his life. He has some scary friends and he isn't really fiscally responsible.

Oh, I don't know. I wish I knew what I was trying to write here. I guess since he was here tonight and things didn't seem quite right, and he seemed tired and maybe unhappy, he's on my mind. I thought maybe writing this down would help me make sense or sort it all out. Not.

 Muddled Mags

Those pesky Resolutions part II

I really hate all the articles I'm reading about "hey, who already broke their New Year's resolutions?".  Maybe because I, sorta, already broke mine and I don't like it being rubbed in my face.

I say sorta because I have and I haven't. I guess though, if I didn't do it, it means "broke" for any reason whatsoever. First the list of resolutions I have completed to date:

• First, I went back on my diet. Check!
• Second: I am still loving my new dog, which is so easy to do because he is adorable! Check!
• Third: make something I pinned on Pinterest at least once time a month. I actually did this today! I made a giant 3-D snowflake, which would've been super cool if I would've been smart enough to take a picture of it. As it is, you need to take my word for it, that I did it. And here's a link with the directions and a picture of what I did. Check!
• Make time to do fun and relaxing things is the goal. Last night I watched 7 episodes of The Voice that I had on DVR. I laid on the couch and watched one after the other. Tonight I'm watching re-runs of Criminal Minds while I write this blog. I went to Hobby Lobby and Kohl's with my dad and had coffee which I'm still drinking while wearing my jammies.

 Now here's the list of what I have NOT done yet but it doesn't mean I "broke" my resolutions... yet!

• I haven't exercised yet. My resolution said "exercise" with no other stipulation. So I haven't done it. I think if the entire month goes by and I haven't exercised at all, then we could say I officially didn't do the goal.
• Find a full time job. I haven't FOUND the job yet. I think this is one of those resolutions that if I get all the way through 2013 and it hasn't happened this I think it's a fail. This is the 3rd day of the year so I haven't expected a miracle. Since I'm being honest and telling all, I have not had time to apply or search for a job yet, this year. Not a fail or "broke", again because of the nature of the goal and its wording.
• Read more. I haven't read anything yet. In my mind, my mental goal is to read at least 52 books this year. Last year I read 67 and before that I read more than 100  a year. But to date, I haven't read anything. I don't think this is a fail either, and it will take awhile before it can be determined if I succeed this goal. Note: as always, I have books to read: The Snow Child, The Receptionist, The Kitchen House, In the Sanctuary of Outcasts, and The End of Your Life Book Club. I'm going to read Sanctuary this weekend because it's for my women's book club.

 Guess that brings me to the one and only resolution I have truly broken. I said I wanted to use my camera every single day. I have not. I took pictures on 1/1/13/ That was it. I could cheat and run through the house, snapping pictures left and right but that still means I didn't take a thing yesterday. So yes, I broke it. And you know what really sucks about this one? One my way to work yesterday morning, there was a beautiful sun rise on the way to work, with a clear field of snow with a red barn in the distance- a perfect Midwest winter and I thought to myself "I wish I had my camera!". And that was that.

So I suck. Busted. 

Maybe I can still conquer the rest of them?????

Rule breaker,
Mags

Making the most of a dumb schedule

We had a teacher day today. First, I just want to put a reminder out there that we only have school Mon-Thursday (yes we have every Friday off) but we are a year round school, NOT on a balanced calendar. That being said, we didn't have school on Monday since it was part of our Christmas vacation, we were off Jan. 1 because it was New Year's Day so today is a teacher day.

We have students tomorrow. Do the math. Yes. You are right.

We are going to have kids tomorrow, just 1 single day, and then we all have the three day weekend. Yup.

I have no idea who the brain trust was behind this genius scheduling but yes, it is stupid. Kids in general are hard to get in the mind set of school after a long holiday but OUR kids at Alcatraz are even worse. And then to get them for just a day? Not the best thing I've ever heard in my life.

Tomorrow is going to be a very looooooooooooong day, I just have a gut instinct about it!

Anyway, today was a teacher day. All the certified folks in the building and all the administrators were scheduled to be in a training. So that left me, 2 secretaries, our IT guy, and an administrative assistant to do stuff in the building.

I found stuff to do. Part of my job is to give reading assessments to incoming students and do the new student orientation so I decided to get a jump on tomorrow. I got 6 of our new kids together and did all their testing and their orientation. Yay me for being ahead!

Now I'm ready for anything weird that could- and probably will- happen tomorrow. After all, I work at "Alcatraz".

Librarian in action,
Mags

The Diet: a reprise

I blew the diet over the holidays. And when I say holidays I mean from Thanksgiving until now I blew the diet. And since I was eating the occasional cookie or piece of candy or a helping of potato, I just went all out and blew it to hell.

Before Thanksgiving, I was at a loss of 35 pounds. Now really, I probably lost more but I fell off the dieting food truck (bwahahahahaha!) a few times and gained back a few pounds here and there and then lost that weigh again and then continued losing more.

But for now, I decided to forgo the diet and will go back on on Jan. 2, maybe tomorrow but probably Jan 2.

I don't mind doing the diet, actually. I really was doing well and losing. I was feeling pretty good and after the first week or two I wasn't really struggling. Oh, I had my moments at times, but I was doing pretty well at changing my food lifestyle. And the shakes were helping and guiding my loss,

Lots of people say having a shake diet can't be a lifestyle but as long as it's being produced then I don't see why. I was drinking a shake for breakfast, additionally I would drink a 24 ounce cup of coffee, black. Depending on my hunger level, I would put the shake mix powder in Greek yogurt and then pour that over fresh fruit salad, or I would stir it into a 1/2 cup of oatmeal.

At lunch I would have a salad with no dressing or fat free dressing. Sometimes I had chicken on it and other times not. And when I say a salad, I made a kickass salad with several kinds of lettuce, mushrooms, green peppers, red peppers, yellow or orange peppers, broccoli, tomatoes, cucumbers, and maybe a tablespoon of low fat shredded cheese or an egg, and sometimes chicken or turkey (sometimes dressing, sometimes plain). This was not a small side salad. If I didn't have a salad I would have a Lean Cuisine but it had to be one that was 200 calories or less. I would also have a couple pieces of fruit with lunch.

Mid afternoon was a shake and then I would cook a healthy dinner. I kept some Special K or Weight Watchers snack stuffs, as well as cut up fresh veggies or fruit for snacks. If I was full I would skip my mid afternoon shake and have it in the evening as a snack.

Of course it's not easy and yes I do crave stuff like pasta, cheese, sweets and breads, which is what I've eaten a bunch of since Thanksgiving.

And I have to say I feel like crap most of the time since indulging in all the junk. I felt so much healthier and so much better when I was dieting. And it was so much easier to diet when Daddy-O was doing shakes and when TheSam was doing shakes because then we all ate the same. Neither of them are shake dieting so there's junk food everywhere! But alas, I will overcome it!

So on Jan. 2 (or maybe tomorrow) I'll weigh myself, add the new weight into my trackers and go back to shakes. I'm sure for a week I'll feel terrible and have to fight the cravings; I'll be hungry and probably cranky, but after the hump I'll be better and back on track.

The goal is to not be embarrassed to wear a swim suit this summer. It would be great, if by July 4th, I was at my target weight. We shall see. I'm going to start swimming a couple times a week- we have a pool at work and I'm welcome to use it when the kids aren't in it. I might even get a bicycle for this summer. Not sure about that, but it's a serious thought.

So within 24-48 hours the diet will commence. Yahoo me, right???

wanting to be a skinner
Mags


Dog Blog Here!

A Girl with Goals

I always blather this time of year about New Year Resolutions. I make 'em and break 'em.

I really thought, as I was sitting here typing this, about looking back in my archives to see what my 2012 resolutions were and how I did. Then I decided against it; why mess with my streak, right?

So I did go ahead and make resolutions for 2012. They are *drum roll please* as follows:

• Use my new camera to photograph something every single day
• Go back on my diet (which I strayed from during the holidays) and continue to lose weight
• Exercise
• Make something on my Pinterest each month (or more), whether it's a craft or food or DYI home stuff or quilting or sewing
• Find a full time job with health insurance (then use said insurance to go to the doctor for a check up!)
• Make more time for me to do fun and relaxing things (maybe this will happen when I have one full time job and not have to keep doing about 5 part time ones...)
• Read more
• Keep loving my new dog!!!

It's a start. It's good to have goals, right? Even if I do fail to achieve them, at least I have goals, which is better than I usually do.  I think I'm the only adult  in the world who doesn't have a 1 year plan, let alone a 5 year plan (I hate the question "where do you see yourself in 5 years?").

So, now I need to get down to work!
Mags