I'm probably going to hell for this, or at least have to have a serious conference with God when the time comes

I called our minister at the church a few weeks ago. I wanted to ask him some questions about a part time job opportunity and to discuss some community service outreach ideas I have. And I wanted to talk to him about Social Media marketing the church. He wasn't in and I left a message.

He finally called me back. Three weeks later. By that time I couldn't remember what I wanted. He had been pretty sick and then on vacation. He swears he didn't the message that I called until that day. I laughed and then said, "Well, in my experience ministers don't usually return calls unless someone's dead, having a baby, getting married or wants to give the church a bunch of money."

Oh yeah, I said it. I can't believe I said it. It was out my mouth before I thought. I stumbled around and apologized profusely and said I didn't mean him specifically and just basically rambled and apologized like an idiot. He laughed and said not to worry and he wasn't offended in the least and sometime just being honest is good. And now he knows how I think and he will always make calling me back a priority. And I apologized some more.

As if that wasn't bad enough...

I remembered a few hours later what I wanted and I sent him a text. I didn't think I could bear another phone call. I simplified what I wanted and he responded pretty quickly and made arrangements to get together in the next few weeks to chat. I thanked him very much for getting back to me so quickly, and apologized again for my earlier gaffe. And said, "sometimes my filter doesn't work and I say stupid shit." Then i hit send. Then I re-read what I wrote.

To the minister.

At this point I should've just given up on the minister, the church, God and went back to the heathen that I was so good at being, or else just took a vow of silence. Or found a new church.

I'm apologizing again now, for the profanity, and he sent back text messages that were HILARIOUS! He actually thought it was funny and said that sometimes "there's no other word that's appropriate except for sh**".

I saw him on Sunday morning and he just started laughing before I could say a word. He said I was hilarious and honest and he appreciated that I just would talk and not have to worry about his "job". I said I could be a little more tactful but he said he was not offended in the least, he thought the whole thing was funny, and to not worry about a thing.

At least God didn't strike me down with a lightening bolt.

Yet.

Mags