Here today, Gone Tomorrow

I've stayed away from Facebook for LOTS of reasons and one of them is my fear of rejection. Yup, that's right: rejection.

From what I gather, people want to add you as a friend to their pages and I'm afraid no one other than my former high school students will want to friend with me. Or that I'll try and friend someone who will decline my friend request. Or worse yet, someone will add me as a friend and then at some arbitrary point in the future, decide to "UNfriend" me. I just couldn't handle it.

Yes, I realize that is completely silly and probably borderline stupid, but right now with the way my life is arranged, I just don't think I could handle any MORE rejection which I would manipulate into into failure.

All that being said, I've been trying to decide what to do with my little followers sidebar thingy. I like that I have followers- that is so cool, unbelievably flattering, and it frankly makes me feel good. I also get jealous when I go to other blogs and they have more followers than me. Then there's the rejection aspect. I lost a follower the other day. Yup- gone. She just decided to quit following me. I wonder if I offended her, or if she just didn't have time to read me (and if that's the case, why is it ME she doesn't read rather than some other blog?) or it just didn't suit her fancy or whatever. See, rejection. I LIKE seeing there are people who choose to be my friend (to quote Bragger!) but it makes me sad when they leave, so I've wondered if I should just omit it and deal.

I want to thank everyone who follows officially and unofficially. I also appreciate your comments and just knowing there are people out there in the great wide world who make time in your busy lives to see what's up with me is amazing, and I thank you. Check out the bloggers in my sidebar who are followers; there are some talented writers in there.

And welcome to all those new followers, who've signed up and those who choose to read! Welcome to my world. I'm glad you're here.

(an aside: I like saying 'followers'; it's so very guru like. Ah, the directions I could go with this.)

And the purpose of this post? Well...... honestly, it probably could've just been a point on a bulleted list of randomosity, but I'm trying to really blog real stuff during this "national blog every day" month and not resort to memes and Johnny D pictures. And lately I'm struggling with feelings of failure and I also lost a follower all at the same time- illogical rationalization I realize but right now I'm sweating the small stuff.

Okay, I'm done. I'm gonna go eat gummibears.

Maggie