Post birthday

Mac's birthday celebration started out very rocky yesterday, with what was a misunderstanding but Mac attacked me verbally rather than just ask what's up. After we got passed that mess, it was a weird day.

I worked but when I got home Mac wanted the car immediately to go see a friend. I let him take it since it was his birthday... on the condition he would be home by 7pm for dinner- a dinner I might add that was his favorite: chicken parmesan. And I decided to give him cash rather than a gift because that's what he wanted. (I was going to get him a video game he wanted but the store was out and it was easier for him to get it himself, later, I guess).

I fixed dinner and made a cake and Mac never showed up. Instead I got a text from him that said he was doing something "nostalgic with Sam. Will be late. Sorry." Fine. Screw it. Daddy-O and I ate without him, and I got everything cleaned up, about an hour late. I got a phone call from work and Mac ate and spent time with Daddy-O. I got off the phone and mac was ready to "meet the guys".

He left.

So my time with Mac on his birthday involved some nasty text messages, a few good texts, 1 good phone call, and about 10 minutes of face time.

I feel bad we didn't have more time together, but I guess at age 19 if that's how he wanted to spend it, then I guess I have to deal with it. I wish, selfishly, I had some nostalgic moments with him but it wasn't meant to be.

What I feel really bad about is that not a single relative sent him a card or called and wished him a happy birthday. Not his dad, not aunts or uncles, not his half brother, not his step mother, not his other grandmother, not or cousins or anyone. Just dad and I are the only ones. Even though he's been a jerk (buttheat, etc) lately that still shouldn't be an excuse people from ignoring his birthday. I feel bad about that. And it hurts Mac's feelings.

A weird day for me as the mom... I love my kid.

Mac's mom,
Maggie